Ryan....

The best part about my job is when I go into my office and I see a bunch of 3 year olds and ms. Lorna playing Barney games on my computer. They all giggle and Ms. Lorna laughs and says,"oh no we got caught!" Then all the little ones start saying hi to me as if they think they've done something wrong and think they can weasle their way outta this one (playing on my computer) using their cuteness...of course it works. It's incredible how beautiful God made children. Just take when they sing the Barney theme song for example. All of these 3 year olds gathered around Ms. Lorna in a small hugging circle on that "and a great big hug" part and then all 7 of them face each other ready to give another kid a huge, juicy smacker on the lips at the "and a kiss from me to you" part. If Ms. Lorna had not stopped them, much germs would have been sloshed that day.
I think one of the greatest lessons I have yet to learn is having child-like faith. A child with the holy spirit seems so certain of what they request of God and so certain that He has heard. Although their hearts are small, the God living in it is as big as the One living in you and I.
I'm really glad the gym is finally finished. It was getting rather quiet and lonely in phase one with just mr. Frank, the TOL staff, and I. Now that the children are back, I receive many heart-warming waves and enthusiastic smiles. Those would be just a few reasons why I love serving the Lord through loving His children.
There is so much to learn from a child...despite the simple lives they lead.


"Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven" Matthew 18:4

I'd rather not say.....

Today was the second day of my internship. Although there's lots to do in the days to come, I've already learned a lot about children's ministry that I've never thought about in the past. I'm realy excited to see what God's leading in this area of ministry will be, as well as what He'll reveal and teach me. I'm also looking foward to going to Orange this year. I remember I wanted to go but somehow wasn't totally lead to sign up, but the Lord had other plans.

I've been asked many times about what I did on my trip. I'll be putting up some videos of this really awesome chinese circus thing I saw in Shanghai as well as the 300 pictures I'm sure you're all very interested to see. Oh...and I'll eventually get to putting prom/graduation/prograd pictures up. All in a days work. Seeing that I have not fully recovered from jetlag (despite the fact that I get plenty of rest) I'm tired. This calls for a nap.

she speaks......

so before I left for Shanghai I had updated but unfortunately computers universally dislike me, therefore my entry was wiped from the existance of this earth. Well, my leg-crossing entry has been up long enough...everyone and their dog should get the idea by now.

One phrase can pretty much sum up my vacation in Hong Kong: It's good to be home. Not to say I didn't thoroughly enjoy my trip; to say the least it was wonderful. It's probably been the best time I've ever had overseas. I've also never done so much shopping in my entire life...and never will...but in all honesty I didn't buy that much. I'm not sure how many of you would actually believe me...but for the considerable amount of shopping I did, I didn't really buy that much. I brought back a lot less stuff than I have in the past.
Anyhow, the first thing I realized when I got back was how thankful I am for drinking fountains. I also noticed that the bathroom stall gaps are a lot bigger in the US. Gaps are almost nonexistant in Hong Kong, and the doors are higher, which is a plus.
This post has taken significantly longer than expected. It is time for me to retire. God bless and rest to all.

Here's some advice for the women in our audience. You are being asked
to
break the fashionable habit of crossing your legs. According to Dr.
Luis
Navarro, a surgeon who runs the Vein Treatment Center at Beth Israel
Medical Center in Manhattan, "Crossing the legs is like second nature
for most women and some men, too. It's a bad habit and one of the first
things you should learn to undo if you suffer from varicose veins.

Crossing your legs slows proper blood flow and elevates pressure inside
the veins. And, according to Navarro, It doesn't matter if you cross at
the knee or the ankles. Both are bad - with knee-crossing the greatest
culprit.

What do experts advise for keeping your leg veins healthy? Among other
things, (1) don't sit for long periods of time, (2) walk at least 30
minutes a day, and (3) flex your toes or rotate your ankles while
sitting.

- Neil Eskelin

washing the clouds away...

Oddly enough, I managed to pack everything but a belt into my suitcase. So the first thing I did when I went shopping with my dad today was to buy a belt. It's exciting to be able to buy something you need and not worry about the cost. Afterall the belt I bought today was only $1.25 US dollars. Ohh..and another thing that got me really excited was bargaining and buying 3 shirts for $3.75...not each, but for three shirts. I also managed to snag a nice $3 case for my digital camera. Anyhow..enough of my happy shopping stories.

Last night I went to eat dinner with my aunt and uncle and they took me to this Japanese place called Osaka. I must say I haven't felt that full since the last time I went to a buffet back in middle school. My aunt is this extremely thin lady who can eat an entire elephant every meal and still have room for dessert, so she took me to this really good steamed egg place after we ate a heafty japanes food meal.
Although I've realized it before, I eat a lot of really weird food. It doesn't really bother me to eat cow stomach or pig ears or whatever weird food comes my way. (i must say that I would never eat a domestic pet... dog or cat ...something like that) And my family really likes to eat really weird food. It gets to the point where I dont really ask what I'm eating. I'm happy as long as the food won't kill me and it tastes good. That sorta reminds me of a week ago when i was signing up for camp, I needed my dad's signature on the camp form. Before my dad signed the form, he looked at me sternly and told me that he would sign my camp form if and only if I promised not to eat anything gross and weird at camp because he heard about John and Niki eating grasshoppers last year at camp. Being a biology major, my dad is naturally sensitive to eating weird organisms and acquiring strange sicknesses. So for those of you going to camp...if you see that I'm tempted to eat weird bugs and whatnot, stop me so I dont have to disobey my father.

well my mom's calling me to go shopping with her... yay for good walking shoes. gosh I'm extremely craving some jogging...maybe I"ll go run on this track they have near where I'm staying at tomorrow =) man i love places that are quite humid but dont believe in air conditioning.

dead beat.....

So it's 5:35pm here in HK, so that means it's 4:35am back home. Whenever I pull all-nighters, I start getting extremely hungry around 4am and all the muscles in my body begin to shut down. Although it is still light out, my biological clock is telling my body that I am very tired...but the jetlag shall be fought!

Yesterday, I went to chill with my grandparents and I got to play with my little cousin Ivan. I must say that he is the most intellegent, flattering, polite, and talkative little 3 yr old I know. To say the least, he's really cute and I can see him growing up to be quite a lady's man. Playing with little kids can definitely be very physically draining. I slept quite well last night. In fact, I don't even remember falling asleep.

The weather here is really nice today. I can feel a nice breeze coming through the window. It's shady outside and hardly humid. In the course of 2 days I've seen pretty much my entire family. Everytime I come back, we have these huge family reunions, it's very crazy. It never ceases to amaze me at how blunt my relatives, as well as many chinese people (women especially), are.

One thing I've noticed about people here is that everyone carries a bag; whether they're a guy or a girl. I think it makes perfect sense for a guy to carry a bag all the time, cuz it seems like most of the time guys tend to be the ones that lose their wallet or keys the most, while girls are usually the ones who are able to find everything.

anyhoo that's enough for today, i'm terribly tired and I think I'm ready to fall asleep! Ooohh yay another uncle just walked through the door! pray for my sister, she's had a fever for a few days now and she has jetlag pretty bad. I miss you all back at home and hopefully when I return I'll still be able to speak english! =P

cloudy in the west looks like rain.....

So lately I've been feeling rather blessed..with everything in particular. Graduation is still quite surreal for me. Anyhoo...just a random thought of the moment. So yes, I'm in Hong Kong right now, sitting at a dining table in the middle of the afternoon updating my blog. So let me tell you a little about my flying overseas experience.

The night before I was suppose to wake up to fly to Hong Kong,I accidentally fell asleep without finish packing. Lucky for my biological clock, I was able to wake up at around 3am to finish packing. (most unfortunately, I forgot some very trivial items) My first connection flight was in San Francisco and I must say the airplane ride in coach was very uncomfortable but that was okay. So when we were waiting for our flight from San Fran to HK we found out that the flight was overbooked and they needed volunteers to go on a later flight. Althought the flight would arrive in HK 3 hours later than the original, you'd get upgraded to business class. So my family thought, what the hay..nothing to lose right? Obviously, many people volunteered cuz gosh... riding business class overseas, stopping in Japan, then connecting to HK. Lucky for my family, we made the 8 person cut for volunteers. I must say that I have never in my life slept so well on a plane. And the food was pretty darn good. There was a choice between filet mignon, chicken, and this japanese box thingy. When i asked for the Japanese box thing, they had just run out, so that was sad. But then this guy happened to find an extra box and offered to me...so yippee. While the flight was great and the movies were cool, my family and i arrived and our luggage had been placed on the wrong flight for the following day. Thank goodness we packed our tooth brushes and whatnots in our backpack. However, no of us had clean clothes. So after more than 24hrs on a plane...we had to end up wearing our stinky clothes. Not only am I currently stuck with my dirty clothes, but better yet, I decided to dress scrubby and comfortable on the plane. This morning, we went to ride the bus to my relatives place...and I looked like I had just walked out of a hospital. Lemme tell ya...fleece pants are hot in extremely humid weather. Right now, I can't say I'm thinking straight because of the jetlag and humid weather and how gross I feel. On the other hand it's nice seeing relatives despite some odd comments. The best part about hk is that you dont really have to drive anywhere... you can ride the bus, subway, you pick..OH and it's kool to get to walk places. Walking rocks. I'm I making any sense? okay...i better go get some water...maybe I'm overheating with dehydration....

It's a party....

My frequent computer deaths have left me unable to update more regularly of the events that are currently occurring in my life. One word to describe my recent situation: graduate. Yes, graduation was this past Saturday and it's hard to believe that it's over. I can hardly remember sitting for two hours watching my classmates walk across the podium and waiting 650 odd people before my parents experienced the pride and joy of their first baby venturing across the podium. It will definitely take a while for me to forget the excitement and the squishing with 600 other classmates through the Bell street entrance door, as well as soaking up the heat to take pictures with family and friends. I’ll load those pictures up before I leave for HK.
Lunch time after graduation was pretty funny. My family and I ran into Jerms and his family, which wasn’t as shocking as seeing all the Clements principals and faculty at another table! It was quite nice to walk around at the galleria after lunch, but then my feet were completely destroyed afterwards. So after passing up many sales, the gang rounded up and headed back to the Toyota Center for the Dulles Graduation! A sea of red is always pretty cool. Once again, there was much picture taking and hugging. There’s something about seeing your friends graduate that really takes your mind off the heat that one has been submerged in.
When all the graduations had been said and done, it was time to go back to Clements one last time as a student. ProGrad! Prograd was a lot of fun. Besides that fact that the day after prograd, my neck was dying and I had this splitting headache. My favorite thing by far had to be the big tricycle things that we got to ride around the history hallways. Those made me feel like a kid again. Playing blackjack was interesting (it was the only gambling I did). There’s something about sitting at a table in a girls gym that just really doesn’t appeal to me, so I used my money for tickets instead. I must have really been lucky that night (although I can’t say I believe in luck). Not only did I walk away from the blackjack table with more than I began with, but I also managed to snag myself a grand prize. I must say it was quite a nice finish to the night because after the hypnosis show, I was seriously ready to pass out.
In the days following graduation, there was much partying at MashPash’s house. Not to mention I’m completely drained of all cash, but every cent was well spent (on food). I would go into detail about this past weekend where I experience the greatest milestone of my life thus far, but I’m leaving for the overseas in a few minutes and I figured I should have a graduation post before I leave, just in case I forget something (not that I ever will unless I get Alzheimer’s). Anyhow, take care and I shall update soon!.

new pictures updated...check em out.

the thank you I owe you....

These past few days have been wonderfully hectic. Despite the fact that much money has been spent, more importantly much quality time has been spent with some very wonderful people. A lot has been blessed upon me these past few weeks, and I feel quite undeserving of it. But it's so important to remember that each day God showers us with blessings that we fail to notice, and everyday God deserves our deepest praise through rain or shine.
On Monday I was beginning to accept the fact that I would be graduating Saturday. Tuesday came and I just thought about how great it was that cal was so incredibly easy. When Wednesday rolled around, I peeked into my wallet only to find that i would be broke if we kept eating out the way we have been. Then today, I didn't focus so much on the fact that my cash supply was draining, but the painful truth that it was my official last day (hour) of high school. When I walked into the parking lot I couldn't believe (and still can't believe) that I will never step foot in that building as a student ever again. Venturing into the future is definitely a huge leap of faith I feel uncertain about. No doubt, I'm really excited, but at the same time, it feels like there's so much I want to hold on to, yet I'm ready to let go...so it's a weird feeling I'm sure someone out there has felt, is feeling, will feel. Once again, I dont know what the future holds, but I DO know Who holds the future. PTL!
When I think about this past week, all I see is food. I see a LOT of food. Monday, La Madeline’s; Tuesday, Chili’s; Wednesday, Wendy’s; Thursday, Chili’s again, then picnic potluck. There are many random memories I wanna remember from this week. It will take me a while to forget about all the food consumed. Then SO many crazy pictures were taken; as well as all sorts of weird comments. When Debs and I were at the Galleria, we ran into Sharon and Sophia. So we decided that we would have dinner together. First stop for dinner food was at Dylan’s Candy Bar. Sophia got us some candy there. Then we went to a Starbucks stand, where Sharon and Sophia ordered a Strawberry *insert the word* frapp. When we finally settled on where we’d be having our official meal, we wandered to Cheesecake factory for our meal… consisting of cheesecake. As we ate, Debs and I shared with them that we had visited the waterwall…which is beautiful by the way… and then after eating cheesecake we felt quite like a waterwall with no free bread. I still feel quite convicted that if I’d consumed a bit more sugar before entering C-factory I would have asked “so…where’s our free bread” although we only ate cheesecake. Haha.. good times good times. And how can I forget all those crazy games we played at Fred’s house this week. Ghost 2…Sardines…to name a few. Then the large gathering at my place and that little “IS THIS A FINGER” dealio. I also really enjoyed getting together with some old sophomore buddies. We had our last day of school Chili’s reunion and then we went to Jenny Lin’s house to watch A Fighter’s Blues. In summary, this week has been splendid, and it totally tops the charts for favorite times senior year. Thanks be to all my friends who are hilarious, gay, and simply awesome. You have truly completed my senior year, and just when I thought the year couldn’t get any better, Class of ’04 is graduating on Saturday. *gasp* Be there or be square. Toyota Center 10am.


I will be posting prom pics very soon....as well as all the pics that i've taken these past few days. Have a great one!

and the reason is You....

I woke up at 12 this morning and it felt great. I like the smell of the morning and the comfort of my blanket when my room is nice and cool. I realized that over the years I’ve come to appreciate the simple joys in life—like nature. I drove around a lot today and I got to see the green trees, fluffy clouds, and a pink and purple sunset. Everything around me was so beautiful and it almost felt as if I’d been swept off my feet. I remember sitting on a bench yesterday at Oyster creek and praising God for how wonderful He is for giving us all these magnificent things to look at. I was walking through a parking lot the other day and feeling sad that if I went blind one day, I would be devastated. Then I thought about people who had never had sight their entire lives and how everyday for them would be just as beautiful. It’s funny how when I was younger, crushing boys gave me butterflies; and now watching a cow chew grass has the same effect on me. One reason I don’t like to drive is not being able to gaze at God’s glorious creation. I guess I could, but then the world would not be very safe for those people who happen to drive by me the instant I’ve been mesmerized by a cow. If you haven’t gotten me a graduation gift yet, just give me a ride in your car down Oilfield on a sunny, blue-skied day, so that I can enjoy the peaceful African safari-like landscape and grass- grinding mouths of cows. God’s a crazy creative being.

So my blog just got entirely deleted and I had to re-write what I had just written. Unfortunately, my memory has become terribly bad over the course of the year and I was unable to remember a large jist of it. So I wrote what my brain could compile. Never using spell check on blogger again. And apparently, my computer is dying… for real. Thank goodness leaving for college gives my dad an excuse to get me a new computer. So tonight I had potluck dinner with my parent’s fellowship, and I got to see Emily and Stella. They basically gave me college survival 101. It was nice talking to them and shopping with them. Dang…that’ll be some of us next year.

So I went all over town today trying to find these very trivial items. I felt very lucky because I was able to find enough of them that were cool enough to purchase. My day is complete, and I think I’m tired enough to close for the night.

cracked the sky like broken glass.....

currently, I am sitting at my desk wearing my dorky NHS collar for fun. Yes, I know...Debs has already established that I am a freak. Freak and proud. Isn't it just the darnest thing to think that the days until graduation are countable on two hands. I'm not sure how I feel about graduation, so ask me about it when it's over. Maybe then I can tell you how I feel. I guess getting out of the disorganized school system is most likely a positive thing. First of all, does anyone really understand what's going on at graduation? I'm not worried, it should be fun. At least we can be sure it wont be like the awards ceremony. I'm thinking people will actually show up to graduation. *hopefully* The principals should have informed people a bit better about whether they were gonna receive an award or not. Apparently, I got this national association of teachers of spanish and portuguese service award, and I wasn't there to get it. However, I was utterly shocked when Torano didn't get mad at me for not showing up. In fact, he told this one person who told another person who told that person's boyfriend who's girlfriend has a class with me to tell me to go find Torano because he had something important to talk to me about. At first, I thought I'd get in trouble about having 10 minutes too little of service hours, but then he told me about the award and that was pretty cool. So I guess three years of dedication to SNHS has finally paid off. You know, after not having Torano for 2 years, I've actually grown quite fond of him. He's an amusing guy, although not the nicest, but he's an alright guy. For what reason? I have yet to determine. However, the service award dealio is pretty. It's got red writing on it...so kewl. I'm telling you...every milestone in life is about some piece of paper...birth, graduation, marriage, and even death.

Oiy...tonight was our last CBS. The group began as just me and Deb. After second semester we expanded by a wopping 50% with the addition of MashPash into our group. Then towards the end of the year our group increased by 33% with the addition of Ann. I've enjoyed my CBS group very much. They're all a bunch of kewl cats, and while we tend to stray off task many a time, I still love them to bits and pieces. I'm so thankful for Margarete. She's simply awesome for putting up with all of our weirdo-ness and always trying to examine the Word with us. I'm gonna miss having her as my CBS leader next year. Good times...good times...

what's with my long entries lately anyhow? I guess I had so much pent up during that period of time I didn't update that often that I'm sort of dumping words out by the bucket now. hehe... ok i'll leave you with that.

There's a million people out there, but it all comes down to one....

It's been a while since I've updated, but after being a blogger-er for quite some time, I can honestly say I am still not obsessive about posting...and there are no feelings of inadequacy if I do not update daily.

I was driving to B&N today to return an AP book which I didn't touch. Today was the 31st day that I had purchased the book, and they only accept returns until the 30th, so I was quite disappointed that my memory had once again failed me...so I would not be refunded my $18.50. However, I am glad to say that the guy was nice, and he gave me money back, no questions asked. I must say that one of the worst habits I've subconciously rededicated my life to is procrastination. By delaying things, I end up tiring myself out by worring about the dumbest things. In the past, I've never had to worry or stress out about school, medical forms, or book returns. I've also realized that I'm not as punctual as I use to be. I'm almost always late to appointments and that's just horrible. Those are two things I've immediately taken action to improve. In fact, I've already begun to see positive results...so I'm happy.

Flipping through some tv channels tonight, I came across that show The Swan. It's really sad how inadequate and discontent those women feel. So many of them suffer from childhood ridicule about the way they look. Too many of them don't want to show their faces in public because one too many bully high school boys told them their nose was too big, or simply that they just weren't pretty. I find it terribly sad that there are women out there that can be so unhappy with their God given looks that they're willing to suffer three months of intense pain resulting from plastic surgery just to gain the approval of society and attain a sense of self-worth. It's a devastating lie when people say "sticks and stone may break my bones but words will never hurt me." The truth is, broken bones will heal, but internal scars take a while...maybe as long as a lifetime. Bottom line, be wise and discerning about what you say...because more likely than not, people take it personally.

I've also noticed how some people tend to become more expressive through blogs. There's this inclination for people to share so much about how they feel, what they're going through, what they want...etc...etc...through writing. I agree that it's easier to express myself through writing, but I dont think that a blog is a good place for people to "get to know you better" if that's the excuse for blogging. You miss SO much of a person by just reading what they're writing versus hearing their voice or seeing them in person. I just feel that when you want people to get to know you, or you want to get to know someone better, it's always worth it to invest the time.

I could rant on forever....but I wont =P Hum...so i guess this was just one of my sudden outbursts of bloggage. Well, I hope you have a wonderful week...and hopefully school will not get you down. The end is nearing!

Romance and Roses.....


soO...my year is finished. sorta.

Prom was the party. Although it really didnt sound like one. The music was a little nersplatishy but that didnt prevent any roof raising from happening cuz there was a quibishsquish of that too. And someone was sure smiling down on us when we looked up and saw the clear skies.
So in memory of prom, I shall proceed to tell the events of that day. (bear with me I'm feeling a long long entry coming on...) I got up saturday during the wee 8 o'clock hours of the morning and began cleaning my room. I spent about 2 hours looking for my constantly risking absurdity timed writing, turning my entire house upside down, but I was unable to find it. Sometime between 10/10:30 Fred stopped by my house for money to pick up the corsages and boutonnieres. Later, Jerms called to tell of some trivial mishaps that were later resolved and the day continued. I had every intention of studying for chem when suddenly my doorbell rang and the girls began to show up. That was when the party really got started. There was some hair do-ing, face make-uping and last minute stuff purchasing. Due to some miscommunication...the gentlemen began showing up at my place at around 5:30. I remember hearing Viv's mom yell "the boys are here" and at that moment i realized I was still in jeans and shirt. After several tens of minutes of mad dashing, all was well and then it was time for the infamous, lets-walk-down-the-stairs performance. Upstairs...the ladies were an absolute breath-taking sight...you know that feeling you get when the sunset it pink and purple, and all these other pretty colors...and it just blows your socks off? Well, watching the girls go down the stairs was sorta like that cuz they were so ridiculously good looking. Below the stairs awaiting us was a long string of handsome young men looking as if they'd walked out of an issue of GQ magazine to take us to prom. After the initial shock of realizing it was the senior guys under that shell they call tux, we proceeded to exhange flowers. Once that task had been tackled, the mom's decided it was time to get super camera happy...and the plans of being on schedule were shot. So when the hours of picture taking had passed...we loitered. When we had enough of loitering....we took some more pictures at Sophia's house...followed by an entourage of camera happy parents. And when our jaws were all smiled out...and the clock was ticking and the time of our reservations was nearing...the gang loaded up in their respective cars and cruised on down to La Strada.
La Strada had some nice bathrooms. Sofas, soft seat cushions...the works! Personally, I thought the food looked really pretty...and I thought my dish tasted better than it looked and sounded. Jalepeno Fettuccine doesnt sound that appealing but it was pretty darn tasty. When we were stuffed to the max, it was time to head over to the Adam's Marks....but not before we took some pictures with a lamppost and bench.
Finally arriving at the hotel, we ran into a huge crowd of ridiculously gorgeous looking people. Once again I felt like I was looking into a pink and purple sunset...so after taking pictures with almost all of the beautiful people at the entrance....we all advanced through a weird canopy thing into the main hall. It was REALLy cold....but the dance floor was stuffy and crowded. We danced a little... we pranced a little and we even drank some water. After the dance, the party was not yet over and we went to get some pie at the House of Pies. Dutch apple pie ala mode tastes like what a pink and purple sunset set would if you could eat it. Before we had to pay the $2.50 sitting fee the gang rounded up and went over to Sophia's house for some pooling, smashing, guitaring, singing, and sequencing.

And when I was all danced out, all smiled out, all eaten out, all laughed out, and all tired out....I was left with a black and purple dress, a dying "peach" corsage, a pair of pencil thin heeled shoes, and a GQ Bruce to thank for a pink and purple sunset memory of my senior prom.

weird new blogger layout. All of a sudden I dont feel like blogging, but this sure was a nice break from having my nose in stu-dying for several hours. So after three years of blogging, I've acquired a nice 584 posts as of today. I'll update forreal some time in the near future.

I'll be there for you....when the rain starts to fall.....

You know, it's a funny thing. The whole good grades and fluff has never really bothered me until about 5 seconds ago when I realized I could have changed the course of my history. My dad and I vented to the chair for a little while, but now the steam has dispersed. I admit, I've been guilty of being study anal several times in my existence, but when I enter a test, I figure I've studied enough and it's too late to do anything at that point anyhow. Well, for a moment today, I thought, "dog bummit.. I could have done something." But it was all just one of those fruitless epiphanies that I'll never be able to change. Everything happens for a reason, so there's really no use crying about the past. But it's sad to think what a big poop it all was. baahh... It's like getting an 89. Ever get one too many of those and feel just a tad on the *raises fist in air* side? It's that *cringe* so close feeling. It's like tantalizing a baby with ice cream on a spoon and never feeding it to his mouth! Eventually, that feeling sort of dies and you're left with a whole bunch of what ifs. What if I had done this differently? What if I had gotten to eat that ice cream off the spoon.....?

So enough of this nonsense. Friends ended well, but slightly disappointing. For obvious reasons, this wonderful ten year situational comedy has come to an abrupt close. Well, where there is an end, there is a beginning. I guess nothing beats ending such an awesome show than the year 2004. The forever finale of Friends is only the beginning to the cycle of stuff that is to come this year. In a few weeks, class of '04 will walk across that podium and go down in Clements history. Then there will be a spectacular summer Olympic games and THEN the soon-to-be class of '08 will come stampeding into college campuses. So many WHOAs this year. It's just like trying to recover from the migrane you have after AP exams. Definitely takes some time.

Speaking of APs...I am SO thankful that I am done with them....for this week. One more to go...Chem...but I suppose it's a battle that shall be tackled with feriocity. Might as well win this years APs with a mighty victory right? I think taking AP exams is such an emotional experience. There are so many thoughts and feelings poured into every question, every free response; and afterwards you're left with this all-thought-out feeling of relief that you can finally put your pencil down and breathe...even if it's only for a brief second. I always walk out of the boys gym after the AP exams with a sense of accomplishment. There's a level of pride that go into the words "I am a mighty survior of the _________ exam." Before every exam, I always say a quick prayer, and let me be the first to tell you that that is the greatest weapon against giving up when this one prose piece in the wackitywackwack free response section of the english literature exam throws you off course. When my hand was vigorously shaking, and sweat beads were dripping from my brow after the Lit exam, I praised the Lord for the strength to conquer that beast. For the first time in my life I was overwhelmed by english, and I was worried walking in this morning. But all fears subsided and as you can see, I have survived to tell the story. Prayer will never fail you, only your human strength will.

Sometimes we think of these two things as in opposition. The Bible never places them so, but shows how perfectly they harmonize. Prayer is one kind of work, necessary to the proper doing of all other kinds. When we pray, we are in touch with God, expectant, trusting: He is at work. He does what we cannot do. We are to be at work also, doing what we can do.

In Paul's closing remarks to the Christians in Colossae he includes greetings from Epaphras.

He prays hard for you all the time....

He works tirelessly for you. (Col 4:12 NEB)

As we pray, the Lord frequently shows us what we ourselves can do to cooperate with Him in bringing about the answer. Let us listen as we pray. Then let us go out and work tirelessly.

--Elizabeth Elliot

that got away......

The weeks that we've all been waiting for are rolling around, and am I prepared? hah...hah....hah....does anyone else feel that way? I feel like I still have a long ways to study before I'll be ready for my AP exams. It almost feels like a deja vu of last year...blek. I seriously think that senior year has caused me to acquire ADD. Is there a cure? I've never really been one to stress over anything, but I cant wait until these next two weeks are over. You know how anticipating time always passes less quickly than looking back at time passing? I figure that's what's going ot happen. Right now, I'm anticipating that these two weeks should pass quickly, and when the weeks are finally over, I'll look back and see how quickly time actually passed. Work hard now, play hard later. Sooner or later, it'll all be over. =)

"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Matthew 6:34

Bottom line, dont stress out about tomorrow or the tomorrow after tomorrow or the tomorrow after the tomorrow of tomorrow.

Best wishes on those APs... and hopefully those two letters will not forever haunt you.

When did you fly so far away.........

So now I know what I've missed, not having watched nearly two full seasons of Friends. It's one of those shows that can make you laugh, cry, and smile all in one episode. I seriously nearly choked on my spit from trying to sneeze and laugh at the same time. Greatest feeling ever. It's a good thing my last AP of the week is next thursday, so I won't have to miss it. Party anyone?

I've never had a teacher like Ms. Beck. And I dont mean that in a negative way at all. There's very few teachers these days in high school that go the extra stretch to encourage their students to try and work harder because they see potential in them. I've never had a teacher call me for the sake of calling me and telling me I could really accomplish something. Given...it's pretty weird when your teacher calls your house. It almost makes me feel bad that I haven't worked harder. Ms. Beck called tonight just to make sure I'd be making time to get to some tutorials for Cal, not to make my life more miserable, but as she put it "had faith" in me to do well on the AP. To be honest, I'd pretty much given up on doing well. The past couple months have been a deterioration of any study habits I've acquired and it's funny how she called me to tell me that just at the right time. I guess every teacher has their way of showing that they care.

A lot of the time, I find that my faith in God is like that. One moment, everything will be great, and my relationship with Him is good. I learn a lot and I understand and hear all the things that He has to teach me. Then I reach some obstacle in my faith that causes me to feel burdened or I simply don't feel like doing what God has planned for me. And when it seems like everything can't be helped, I get that phone call from God telling me that He is with me through everything. If I place my trust and faith in him, there is nothing that cannot be conquered. God's timing is perfect, and he'll rescue you at exactly the right moment. We will fail God, but God will never fail us.

Anyhoo, I was reading Jesse's blog when I came across a little something jack, jess, and I wrote for zander a while back.
So if you've never been to a dance, you need some tips on what you're suppose to do at the dance, and you're a guy. This is for you.

prom tips for guys

stronger than yesterday......

There's this new show on fob tv. (they have mini series) It's called the Golden Hope or something asiany like that. Anyhow, this guy from Hong kong goes to Austrailia for a gem exhibit, cuz his family owns some sort of fancy rock shop. He meets his co-worker down under and discover that he's having a lot of issues. In fact, he discovers that his co-worker is gay and is figuring out how to break it to his girlfriend that he wants to break up with her for another guy. Well his co-worker, named Julian, has this aunt that really likes his gf Rachel. When Rachel shows up in Austrailia from Hong Kong, Julian's aunt says that this random guy named Kim who randomly shows up at Julian's house is actually Ivan's (the guy with the gen exhibit) boyfriend. But Kim was actually Julians new boyfriend. So then Rachel thinks it's Ivan who's gay and not her own boyfriend. Rachel agrees to give Ivan a tour around Austrailia and in the process Ivan recues her from some thieves. Then when Julian breaks up with Rachel...she's shocked and goes into some gem mine...and Ivan goes to rescue her. Then they sorta get the jones for each other and due to circmstance Ivan has to go back to hk. Then back in hk Ivan gets arrested and Rachel ends up being the lawyer who is oppsing him. Sounds interesting...i might just watch this show.

TAKs rocks. and i have nothing else to say.