It's a party....

My frequent computer deaths have left me unable to update more regularly of the events that are currently occurring in my life. One word to describe my recent situation: graduate. Yes, graduation was this past Saturday and it's hard to believe that it's over. I can hardly remember sitting for two hours watching my classmates walk across the podium and waiting 650 odd people before my parents experienced the pride and joy of their first baby venturing across the podium. It will definitely take a while for me to forget the excitement and the squishing with 600 other classmates through the Bell street entrance door, as well as soaking up the heat to take pictures with family and friends. I’ll load those pictures up before I leave for HK.
Lunch time after graduation was pretty funny. My family and I ran into Jerms and his family, which wasn’t as shocking as seeing all the Clements principals and faculty at another table! It was quite nice to walk around at the galleria after lunch, but then my feet were completely destroyed afterwards. So after passing up many sales, the gang rounded up and headed back to the Toyota Center for the Dulles Graduation! A sea of red is always pretty cool. Once again, there was much picture taking and hugging. There’s something about seeing your friends graduate that really takes your mind off the heat that one has been submerged in.
When all the graduations had been said and done, it was time to go back to Clements one last time as a student. ProGrad! Prograd was a lot of fun. Besides that fact that the day after prograd, my neck was dying and I had this splitting headache. My favorite thing by far had to be the big tricycle things that we got to ride around the history hallways. Those made me feel like a kid again. Playing blackjack was interesting (it was the only gambling I did). There’s something about sitting at a table in a girls gym that just really doesn’t appeal to me, so I used my money for tickets instead. I must have really been lucky that night (although I can’t say I believe in luck). Not only did I walk away from the blackjack table with more than I began with, but I also managed to snag myself a grand prize. I must say it was quite a nice finish to the night because after the hypnosis show, I was seriously ready to pass out.
In the days following graduation, there was much partying at MashPash’s house. Not to mention I’m completely drained of all cash, but every cent was well spent (on food). I would go into detail about this past weekend where I experience the greatest milestone of my life thus far, but I’m leaving for the overseas in a few minutes and I figured I should have a graduation post before I leave, just in case I forget something (not that I ever will unless I get Alzheimer’s). Anyhow, take care and I shall update soon!.

new pictures updated...check em out.

the thank you I owe you....

These past few days have been wonderfully hectic. Despite the fact that much money has been spent, more importantly much quality time has been spent with some very wonderful people. A lot has been blessed upon me these past few weeks, and I feel quite undeserving of it. But it's so important to remember that each day God showers us with blessings that we fail to notice, and everyday God deserves our deepest praise through rain or shine.
On Monday I was beginning to accept the fact that I would be graduating Saturday. Tuesday came and I just thought about how great it was that cal was so incredibly easy. When Wednesday rolled around, I peeked into my wallet only to find that i would be broke if we kept eating out the way we have been. Then today, I didn't focus so much on the fact that my cash supply was draining, but the painful truth that it was my official last day (hour) of high school. When I walked into the parking lot I couldn't believe (and still can't believe) that I will never step foot in that building as a student ever again. Venturing into the future is definitely a huge leap of faith I feel uncertain about. No doubt, I'm really excited, but at the same time, it feels like there's so much I want to hold on to, yet I'm ready to let go...so it's a weird feeling I'm sure someone out there has felt, is feeling, will feel. Once again, I dont know what the future holds, but I DO know Who holds the future. PTL!
When I think about this past week, all I see is food. I see a LOT of food. Monday, La Madeline’s; Tuesday, Chili’s; Wednesday, Wendy’s; Thursday, Chili’s again, then picnic potluck. There are many random memories I wanna remember from this week. It will take me a while to forget about all the food consumed. Then SO many crazy pictures were taken; as well as all sorts of weird comments. When Debs and I were at the Galleria, we ran into Sharon and Sophia. So we decided that we would have dinner together. First stop for dinner food was at Dylan’s Candy Bar. Sophia got us some candy there. Then we went to a Starbucks stand, where Sharon and Sophia ordered a Strawberry *insert the word* frapp. When we finally settled on where we’d be having our official meal, we wandered to Cheesecake factory for our meal… consisting of cheesecake. As we ate, Debs and I shared with them that we had visited the waterwall…which is beautiful by the way… and then after eating cheesecake we felt quite like a waterwall with no free bread. I still feel quite convicted that if I’d consumed a bit more sugar before entering C-factory I would have asked “so…where’s our free bread” although we only ate cheesecake. Haha.. good times good times. And how can I forget all those crazy games we played at Fred’s house this week. Ghost 2…Sardines…to name a few. Then the large gathering at my place and that little “IS THIS A FINGER” dealio. I also really enjoyed getting together with some old sophomore buddies. We had our last day of school Chili’s reunion and then we went to Jenny Lin’s house to watch A Fighter’s Blues. In summary, this week has been splendid, and it totally tops the charts for favorite times senior year. Thanks be to all my friends who are hilarious, gay, and simply awesome. You have truly completed my senior year, and just when I thought the year couldn’t get any better, Class of ’04 is graduating on Saturday. *gasp* Be there or be square. Toyota Center 10am.


I will be posting prom pics very soon....as well as all the pics that i've taken these past few days. Have a great one!

and the reason is You....

I woke up at 12 this morning and it felt great. I like the smell of the morning and the comfort of my blanket when my room is nice and cool. I realized that over the years I’ve come to appreciate the simple joys in life—like nature. I drove around a lot today and I got to see the green trees, fluffy clouds, and a pink and purple sunset. Everything around me was so beautiful and it almost felt as if I’d been swept off my feet. I remember sitting on a bench yesterday at Oyster creek and praising God for how wonderful He is for giving us all these magnificent things to look at. I was walking through a parking lot the other day and feeling sad that if I went blind one day, I would be devastated. Then I thought about people who had never had sight their entire lives and how everyday for them would be just as beautiful. It’s funny how when I was younger, crushing boys gave me butterflies; and now watching a cow chew grass has the same effect on me. One reason I don’t like to drive is not being able to gaze at God’s glorious creation. I guess I could, but then the world would not be very safe for those people who happen to drive by me the instant I’ve been mesmerized by a cow. If you haven’t gotten me a graduation gift yet, just give me a ride in your car down Oilfield on a sunny, blue-skied day, so that I can enjoy the peaceful African safari-like landscape and grass- grinding mouths of cows. God’s a crazy creative being.

So my blog just got entirely deleted and I had to re-write what I had just written. Unfortunately, my memory has become terribly bad over the course of the year and I was unable to remember a large jist of it. So I wrote what my brain could compile. Never using spell check on blogger again. And apparently, my computer is dying… for real. Thank goodness leaving for college gives my dad an excuse to get me a new computer. So tonight I had potluck dinner with my parent’s fellowship, and I got to see Emily and Stella. They basically gave me college survival 101. It was nice talking to them and shopping with them. Dang…that’ll be some of us next year.

So I went all over town today trying to find these very trivial items. I felt very lucky because I was able to find enough of them that were cool enough to purchase. My day is complete, and I think I’m tired enough to close for the night.

cracked the sky like broken glass.....

currently, I am sitting at my desk wearing my dorky NHS collar for fun. Yes, I know...Debs has already established that I am a freak. Freak and proud. Isn't it just the darnest thing to think that the days until graduation are countable on two hands. I'm not sure how I feel about graduation, so ask me about it when it's over. Maybe then I can tell you how I feel. I guess getting out of the disorganized school system is most likely a positive thing. First of all, does anyone really understand what's going on at graduation? I'm not worried, it should be fun. At least we can be sure it wont be like the awards ceremony. I'm thinking people will actually show up to graduation. *hopefully* The principals should have informed people a bit better about whether they were gonna receive an award or not. Apparently, I got this national association of teachers of spanish and portuguese service award, and I wasn't there to get it. However, I was utterly shocked when Torano didn't get mad at me for not showing up. In fact, he told this one person who told another person who told that person's boyfriend who's girlfriend has a class with me to tell me to go find Torano because he had something important to talk to me about. At first, I thought I'd get in trouble about having 10 minutes too little of service hours, but then he told me about the award and that was pretty cool. So I guess three years of dedication to SNHS has finally paid off. You know, after not having Torano for 2 years, I've actually grown quite fond of him. He's an amusing guy, although not the nicest, but he's an alright guy. For what reason? I have yet to determine. However, the service award dealio is pretty. It's got red writing on it...so kewl. I'm telling you...every milestone in life is about some piece of paper...birth, graduation, marriage, and even death.

Oiy...tonight was our last CBS. The group began as just me and Deb. After second semester we expanded by a wopping 50% with the addition of MashPash into our group. Then towards the end of the year our group increased by 33% with the addition of Ann. I've enjoyed my CBS group very much. They're all a bunch of kewl cats, and while we tend to stray off task many a time, I still love them to bits and pieces. I'm so thankful for Margarete. She's simply awesome for putting up with all of our weirdo-ness and always trying to examine the Word with us. I'm gonna miss having her as my CBS leader next year. Good times...good times...

what's with my long entries lately anyhow? I guess I had so much pent up during that period of time I didn't update that often that I'm sort of dumping words out by the bucket now. hehe... ok i'll leave you with that.

There's a million people out there, but it all comes down to one....

It's been a while since I've updated, but after being a blogger-er for quite some time, I can honestly say I am still not obsessive about posting...and there are no feelings of inadequacy if I do not update daily.

I was driving to B&N today to return an AP book which I didn't touch. Today was the 31st day that I had purchased the book, and they only accept returns until the 30th, so I was quite disappointed that my memory had once again failed me...so I would not be refunded my $18.50. However, I am glad to say that the guy was nice, and he gave me money back, no questions asked. I must say that one of the worst habits I've subconciously rededicated my life to is procrastination. By delaying things, I end up tiring myself out by worring about the dumbest things. In the past, I've never had to worry or stress out about school, medical forms, or book returns. I've also realized that I'm not as punctual as I use to be. I'm almost always late to appointments and that's just horrible. Those are two things I've immediately taken action to improve. In fact, I've already begun to see positive results...so I'm happy.

Flipping through some tv channels tonight, I came across that show The Swan. It's really sad how inadequate and discontent those women feel. So many of them suffer from childhood ridicule about the way they look. Too many of them don't want to show their faces in public because one too many bully high school boys told them their nose was too big, or simply that they just weren't pretty. I find it terribly sad that there are women out there that can be so unhappy with their God given looks that they're willing to suffer three months of intense pain resulting from plastic surgery just to gain the approval of society and attain a sense of self-worth. It's a devastating lie when people say "sticks and stone may break my bones but words will never hurt me." The truth is, broken bones will heal, but internal scars take a while...maybe as long as a lifetime. Bottom line, be wise and discerning about what you say...because more likely than not, people take it personally.

I've also noticed how some people tend to become more expressive through blogs. There's this inclination for people to share so much about how they feel, what they're going through, what they want...etc...etc...through writing. I agree that it's easier to express myself through writing, but I dont think that a blog is a good place for people to "get to know you better" if that's the excuse for blogging. You miss SO much of a person by just reading what they're writing versus hearing their voice or seeing them in person. I just feel that when you want people to get to know you, or you want to get to know someone better, it's always worth it to invest the time.

I could rant on forever....but I wont =P Hum...so i guess this was just one of my sudden outbursts of bloggage. Well, I hope you have a wonderful week...and hopefully school will not get you down. The end is nearing!

Romance and Roses.....


soO...my year is finished. sorta.

Prom was the party. Although it really didnt sound like one. The music was a little nersplatishy but that didnt prevent any roof raising from happening cuz there was a quibishsquish of that too. And someone was sure smiling down on us when we looked up and saw the clear skies.
So in memory of prom, I shall proceed to tell the events of that day. (bear with me I'm feeling a long long entry coming on...) I got up saturday during the wee 8 o'clock hours of the morning and began cleaning my room. I spent about 2 hours looking for my constantly risking absurdity timed writing, turning my entire house upside down, but I was unable to find it. Sometime between 10/10:30 Fred stopped by my house for money to pick up the corsages and boutonnieres. Later, Jerms called to tell of some trivial mishaps that were later resolved and the day continued. I had every intention of studying for chem when suddenly my doorbell rang and the girls began to show up. That was when the party really got started. There was some hair do-ing, face make-uping and last minute stuff purchasing. Due to some miscommunication...the gentlemen began showing up at my place at around 5:30. I remember hearing Viv's mom yell "the boys are here" and at that moment i realized I was still in jeans and shirt. After several tens of minutes of mad dashing, all was well and then it was time for the infamous, lets-walk-down-the-stairs performance. Upstairs...the ladies were an absolute breath-taking sight...you know that feeling you get when the sunset it pink and purple, and all these other pretty colors...and it just blows your socks off? Well, watching the girls go down the stairs was sorta like that cuz they were so ridiculously good looking. Below the stairs awaiting us was a long string of handsome young men looking as if they'd walked out of an issue of GQ magazine to take us to prom. After the initial shock of realizing it was the senior guys under that shell they call tux, we proceeded to exhange flowers. Once that task had been tackled, the mom's decided it was time to get super camera happy...and the plans of being on schedule were shot. So when the hours of picture taking had passed...we loitered. When we had enough of loitering....we took some more pictures at Sophia's house...followed by an entourage of camera happy parents. And when our jaws were all smiled out...and the clock was ticking and the time of our reservations was nearing...the gang loaded up in their respective cars and cruised on down to La Strada.
La Strada had some nice bathrooms. Sofas, soft seat cushions...the works! Personally, I thought the food looked really pretty...and I thought my dish tasted better than it looked and sounded. Jalepeno Fettuccine doesnt sound that appealing but it was pretty darn tasty. When we were stuffed to the max, it was time to head over to the Adam's Marks....but not before we took some pictures with a lamppost and bench.
Finally arriving at the hotel, we ran into a huge crowd of ridiculously gorgeous looking people. Once again I felt like I was looking into a pink and purple sunset...so after taking pictures with almost all of the beautiful people at the entrance....we all advanced through a weird canopy thing into the main hall. It was REALLy cold....but the dance floor was stuffy and crowded. We danced a little... we pranced a little and we even drank some water. After the dance, the party was not yet over and we went to get some pie at the House of Pies. Dutch apple pie ala mode tastes like what a pink and purple sunset set would if you could eat it. Before we had to pay the $2.50 sitting fee the gang rounded up and went over to Sophia's house for some pooling, smashing, guitaring, singing, and sequencing.

And when I was all danced out, all smiled out, all eaten out, all laughed out, and all tired out....I was left with a black and purple dress, a dying "peach" corsage, a pair of pencil thin heeled shoes, and a GQ Bruce to thank for a pink and purple sunset memory of my senior prom.

weird new blogger layout. All of a sudden I dont feel like blogging, but this sure was a nice break from having my nose in stu-dying for several hours. So after three years of blogging, I've acquired a nice 584 posts as of today. I'll update forreal some time in the near future.

I'll be there for you....when the rain starts to fall.....

You know, it's a funny thing. The whole good grades and fluff has never really bothered me until about 5 seconds ago when I realized I could have changed the course of my history. My dad and I vented to the chair for a little while, but now the steam has dispersed. I admit, I've been guilty of being study anal several times in my existence, but when I enter a test, I figure I've studied enough and it's too late to do anything at that point anyhow. Well, for a moment today, I thought, "dog bummit.. I could have done something." But it was all just one of those fruitless epiphanies that I'll never be able to change. Everything happens for a reason, so there's really no use crying about the past. But it's sad to think what a big poop it all was. baahh... It's like getting an 89. Ever get one too many of those and feel just a tad on the *raises fist in air* side? It's that *cringe* so close feeling. It's like tantalizing a baby with ice cream on a spoon and never feeding it to his mouth! Eventually, that feeling sort of dies and you're left with a whole bunch of what ifs. What if I had done this differently? What if I had gotten to eat that ice cream off the spoon.....?

So enough of this nonsense. Friends ended well, but slightly disappointing. For obvious reasons, this wonderful ten year situational comedy has come to an abrupt close. Well, where there is an end, there is a beginning. I guess nothing beats ending such an awesome show than the year 2004. The forever finale of Friends is only the beginning to the cycle of stuff that is to come this year. In a few weeks, class of '04 will walk across that podium and go down in Clements history. Then there will be a spectacular summer Olympic games and THEN the soon-to-be class of '08 will come stampeding into college campuses. So many WHOAs this year. It's just like trying to recover from the migrane you have after AP exams. Definitely takes some time.

Speaking of APs...I am SO thankful that I am done with them....for this week. One more to go...Chem...but I suppose it's a battle that shall be tackled with feriocity. Might as well win this years APs with a mighty victory right? I think taking AP exams is such an emotional experience. There are so many thoughts and feelings poured into every question, every free response; and afterwards you're left with this all-thought-out feeling of relief that you can finally put your pencil down and breathe...even if it's only for a brief second. I always walk out of the boys gym after the AP exams with a sense of accomplishment. There's a level of pride that go into the words "I am a mighty survior of the _________ exam." Before every exam, I always say a quick prayer, and let me be the first to tell you that that is the greatest weapon against giving up when this one prose piece in the wackitywackwack free response section of the english literature exam throws you off course. When my hand was vigorously shaking, and sweat beads were dripping from my brow after the Lit exam, I praised the Lord for the strength to conquer that beast. For the first time in my life I was overwhelmed by english, and I was worried walking in this morning. But all fears subsided and as you can see, I have survived to tell the story. Prayer will never fail you, only your human strength will.

Sometimes we think of these two things as in opposition. The Bible never places them so, but shows how perfectly they harmonize. Prayer is one kind of work, necessary to the proper doing of all other kinds. When we pray, we are in touch with God, expectant, trusting: He is at work. He does what we cannot do. We are to be at work also, doing what we can do.

In Paul's closing remarks to the Christians in Colossae he includes greetings from Epaphras.

He prays hard for you all the time....

He works tirelessly for you. (Col 4:12 NEB)

As we pray, the Lord frequently shows us what we ourselves can do to cooperate with Him in bringing about the answer. Let us listen as we pray. Then let us go out and work tirelessly.

--Elizabeth Elliot

that got away......

The weeks that we've all been waiting for are rolling around, and am I prepared? hah...hah....hah....does anyone else feel that way? I feel like I still have a long ways to study before I'll be ready for my AP exams. It almost feels like a deja vu of last year...blek. I seriously think that senior year has caused me to acquire ADD. Is there a cure? I've never really been one to stress over anything, but I cant wait until these next two weeks are over. You know how anticipating time always passes less quickly than looking back at time passing? I figure that's what's going ot happen. Right now, I'm anticipating that these two weeks should pass quickly, and when the weeks are finally over, I'll look back and see how quickly time actually passed. Work hard now, play hard later. Sooner or later, it'll all be over. =)

"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Matthew 6:34

Bottom line, dont stress out about tomorrow or the tomorrow after tomorrow or the tomorrow after the tomorrow of tomorrow.

Best wishes on those APs... and hopefully those two letters will not forever haunt you.

When did you fly so far away.........

So now I know what I've missed, not having watched nearly two full seasons of Friends. It's one of those shows that can make you laugh, cry, and smile all in one episode. I seriously nearly choked on my spit from trying to sneeze and laugh at the same time. Greatest feeling ever. It's a good thing my last AP of the week is next thursday, so I won't have to miss it. Party anyone?

I've never had a teacher like Ms. Beck. And I dont mean that in a negative way at all. There's very few teachers these days in high school that go the extra stretch to encourage their students to try and work harder because they see potential in them. I've never had a teacher call me for the sake of calling me and telling me I could really accomplish something. Given...it's pretty weird when your teacher calls your house. It almost makes me feel bad that I haven't worked harder. Ms. Beck called tonight just to make sure I'd be making time to get to some tutorials for Cal, not to make my life more miserable, but as she put it "had faith" in me to do well on the AP. To be honest, I'd pretty much given up on doing well. The past couple months have been a deterioration of any study habits I've acquired and it's funny how she called me to tell me that just at the right time. I guess every teacher has their way of showing that they care.

A lot of the time, I find that my faith in God is like that. One moment, everything will be great, and my relationship with Him is good. I learn a lot and I understand and hear all the things that He has to teach me. Then I reach some obstacle in my faith that causes me to feel burdened or I simply don't feel like doing what God has planned for me. And when it seems like everything can't be helped, I get that phone call from God telling me that He is with me through everything. If I place my trust and faith in him, there is nothing that cannot be conquered. God's timing is perfect, and he'll rescue you at exactly the right moment. We will fail God, but God will never fail us.

Anyhoo, I was reading Jesse's blog when I came across a little something jack, jess, and I wrote for zander a while back.
So if you've never been to a dance, you need some tips on what you're suppose to do at the dance, and you're a guy. This is for you.

prom tips for guys

stronger than yesterday......

There's this new show on fob tv. (they have mini series) It's called the Golden Hope or something asiany like that. Anyhow, this guy from Hong kong goes to Austrailia for a gem exhibit, cuz his family owns some sort of fancy rock shop. He meets his co-worker down under and discover that he's having a lot of issues. In fact, he discovers that his co-worker is gay and is figuring out how to break it to his girlfriend that he wants to break up with her for another guy. Well his co-worker, named Julian, has this aunt that really likes his gf Rachel. When Rachel shows up in Austrailia from Hong Kong, Julian's aunt says that this random guy named Kim who randomly shows up at Julian's house is actually Ivan's (the guy with the gen exhibit) boyfriend. But Kim was actually Julians new boyfriend. So then Rachel thinks it's Ivan who's gay and not her own boyfriend. Rachel agrees to give Ivan a tour around Austrailia and in the process Ivan recues her from some thieves. Then when Julian breaks up with Rachel...she's shocked and goes into some gem mine...and Ivan goes to rescue her. Then they sorta get the jones for each other and due to circmstance Ivan has to go back to hk. Then back in hk Ivan gets arrested and Rachel ends up being the lawyer who is oppsing him. Sounds interesting...i might just watch this show.

TAKs rocks. and i have nothing else to say.

Hovering above the ground.......

I started watching the Rockets vs. Lakers game after halftime....then I started getting really drowsy and took a nap in my room. A little time passed (I dont even remember really falling asleep), and I hear a LOUD racket outside my doors in the game room. As I rose to conciousness, I realized that the noise was my father and sister shouting at the television screen. So being the lazy butt that I was feeling, i tried to go back to sleep, but to no avail. Finally, after an eternity, I rolled myself out of bed and into the presence of the idiot box and my family. I thought the game was pretty intense, although I think the doubts that many people had in the Rockets truly jinxed them. Tis a sad sad thing. How disappointing to lose after such a game! I cant imagine watching basketball games all the time. If I did that...I think I'd be dead by age 30 from a heart attack. Thank goodness the Olympics are every two years....or I'd have some serious issues. I can feel my heart rate increase at the approach of the 2004 summer games in Athens! I think they begin August 17th. =)

I've been telling myself to study for the past 2 hours. It's funny thinking back a few years when I use to be hard-working. I can't believe how hard i use to study....and the only thing that's changed is I'm a senior. What a big difference that word can do to you. I came across the blog Jesse, Jack, and I use to have....and i saw the entry that I wrote a mock senior reflection/column for Jess (exactly a year before today). The things I wrote about on that reflection are things that I'm feeling right now about my senior year... looking back at the past 18 years of my life. Maybe I'll post it some time. I was talking to Jesse a few days ago, and she told me to go and read it. I'm guessing she asked me to write that last year so that I could look back on that column and be totally shocked. I am really shocked, and I cant believe I survived another year of high school....afterall, I was ready to be out last year at this time. It's a curious thing wondering what I'll be thinking exactly a year from today. Remember to ask me this day next year. (maybe I'll give you a prize) I'm thinking maybe I'll be so sick of Juice by this time next year that I'll have moved out of our dorm and into my tent, pitched in the middle of the hallway...teehee..but that will never happen *knock on wood* Please assure me that the rooming with your good friend and hating them myth isn't true!

now that I've written way too much, and wasted way to much of your time..... I shall go and study for those wutchamacalits that i'll be taking in a little over a week. BUT PTL for TAKS!! =D

as we go on we remember all the times we've had together.....

So I got several emails from an old friend about a drama festival he went to. It sounded unbelievably exciting. The festival had all sorts of workshops for both techies and thespians. There was one about massive sophisticated lighting. Another workshop taught how to choreograph sword fight scenes. The exciting part about the emails was just the fact that his thespian group did awesome at the festival and got some pretty amazing marks. I really miss stage production and all the craziness and stress that went with it. I also remember how heartbroken I was when I found out I hadn't made the musical. Being rejected from something I felt so passionate about was pretty heart wrenching. Looking back on those times, I remember why I hadn't been casted. I also remembered why I hesitated to be a thespian again after that experience. Although I stopped acting for awhile, God sorta brought drama back into my life. I remember the Christmas production two years back. It was so much fun, and it was a really great experience for me. I loved acting with the cast and how exciting it was to be able to tell the story of Jesus through drama. Being a part of this play wasn't like the other ones I'd been casted in. Acting for the Lord didn't bring glory to myself, and that was the best part. All was done for the glory of God.

That is the most rewarding thing about being on drama team. It's exciting to be a vessel for the Lord, to glorify Him by using the talents he's given us, and letting the spirit that stirs in us to touch the hearts of others. I've explored a lot of activities in my life, and there's never been one thing that I've really excelled at. But I've always loved to act, and that's something I can carry with me for the rest of my life. Drama is an act of worship for God. And like I always tell the little kids, worship means showing God how much we love him. What's your act of worship?

His promise will endure forever.....

Looking at all the answered prayers in my life, I cant be more certain that God is faithful to fulfill his perfect plan.
It's a curious thing wondering how all these pieces of the puzzle will come together.

So the officer apps for sfc were due today ...or well officially tomorrow. But I've received two apps and two people have said they plan to submit one. It's pretty exciting, cuz 75% of the applicants aren't chinese. Not to say I dont love chinese people, but I'd really love to see students for Christ diversify, and I guess having a group of officers who are African American, Indian, Caucasian, and Chinese is a nice leap in that direction. God's really blessed sfc this year, not just with members, but with an overall pretty committed, caring group of officers, and people who've prayed for us. Seeing how the club has grown this year is pretty awesome. I really pray for God's continual provision for the club and the growth of the Christian community at Clements. It reminds me of the little kid song they sing in the nursery, "people need the Lord." Yes, people do need the Lord, and it's just great to have a place where Christians can encourage and fellowship with one another in a secular world. I've read some of the apps and they all seem to have a pretty similar vision-- to see SFC grow and to reach others for Christ. I'm excited to see how God uses next years officers and how His plan will unfold to impact Clements. Please keep students for Christ and the future officers of the club in your prayers. Thanks!

modern day cinderella.....

Family Matters is a great show. I was watching it yesterday and the entire episode promoted such good morals. They talked about obeying your parents, responsibility, trust, and clean relationships. Not only do they advocate positive conduct, but there's a lot of humor, and there's a lot of things about the show that make it very entertaining. Now I remember why television use to be worth watching. Then I decided to give One Tree Hill another chance. There were very few positive things about that show. It's gotten a bit over dramatic and some of the issues they promote, I dont quite fancy. I have to say that many of the actors are better than some of the other shows out there....but when I watch that show, it makes me so disappointed to see what our society has become...and to witness some of the things we now tolerate so much more. It's funny how so many shows today are very alike. They make them so simliar because it's what people like to watch. Not to say all shows are bad, because there are some good shows out there I'm sure (take PBS for example), but it's still sad thinking 10 years ago, everything was a comedy...now everything is drama....and conflict.

anyhoo...got this from an old friend's profile....hehe

advice for women:
1. Don't imagine you can change a man- unless he's in diapers.
2. What do you do if your bf walks out? Shut the door.
3. Go for younger men. You might as well-they never mature anyway.
4. Def. of a bachelor: a man who has missed the chance to make some woman miserable.
5. Never let your man's mind wander- it's too little to be out alone.
6. If he asks you what sort of books you're interested in, tell him checkbooks.
7. Best way to get a man to do something, is to suggest he's too old for it.
8. Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.
9. If you want a committed man, look in a mental hospital.
10. Sadly, all men are created equal.

no such thing as coincidence and luck......

That was probably the longest blog fast I've had for a while.
So...this is the last six weeks we've all been waiting for!!!!!! It's weird...I've never really thought about the termination of high school. Actually, I was sorta thinking high school would last forever. I thought this vicious cycle of school work, Clements, SATs, grades, TAKS, drama, and stress....would never end. And perhaps...some things on that list never will....but being spat out of high school will definitely be a step up...a refreshing one for that matter. So much to look forward to, yet at the same time, so much to want to hold on to.....not to say that I thoroughly enjoyed my high school experience, but there are many good things about it that I will forever cheerish.

Currently, I am eating these dehydrated vegetable calcium carbonate japanese seaweed crackers. They are really good.

Oh right... i do have something to update about...Districts! It was fun. I ran poorly, but that's kool. It was a great end to seven years of hurdling. DUDE we got to run at the new HALL stadium at Hightower. Man...that stadium rocks. Although, the artificial grass in the center is a tad on the wacky side, the track is SUPER AWESOME.....however it's condition could not ever in a million years surpass the wonderous quality of the BRAND NEW CLEMENTS TRACK...that has yet to be painted. I'll miss track a whole TON. I believe next year around this time, I will have a void in my life for the lack of vigorous running activity. I suppose that could all be corrected. As of now, I will resume my sidewalk/grass/ at the park running activities until it's too hot to run. Then when it gets too hot, the pool will be open. I've lived in this neighborhood 2 going on 3 years...and i've only been swimming in the community pool twice. This year...that will all change. I'm going to make the best use of my association fee! Okay....time to go watch my sisters teddy bear puppet show.

An Appreciation of Happiness

Here’s one definition of happiness:
Happiness is…going to sleep at peace with your self and the world.
Having a new book, whether borrowed from the library or bought.
Picking up autumn leaves to admire their beauty.
Being at home with the lights on just at twilight.
Bundling up against the winter’s cold to take a refreshing walk.
The slow, silent fall of soft, white snow.
Reflecting on the past, enjoying the present, anticipating the future.
How would you define happiness? It has been said that, “we carry the seed of happiness within our own minds.” Nurture that seed today and each and every day.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Happy are those who find wisdom. (Proverbs 3:13)
Teach us wisdom, root of happiness, Holy Spirit

out to get me....

My family and some friends went out to eat crawfish today. We ate a total of 45lbs of crawfish. I guess that's not that much considering we had 15 people and crawfish are only *yay* big. It was very tasty indeed....nice and spicy. Oh, and then we ate vietnamese sandwiches.....man the bbq pork and the special kind are really good. They're cheaper than american subs and personally, I think they taste a whole lot better. So if you're ever in the mood for a viet sub, gimme a ring and I'll be there in a jiffy.

I've been reading Wuthering Heights most of today, and I really like the book. I dig the whole victorian goth genre. The story was a little confusing in the beginning, but it's meant to be that way. Once I sorta got into it, the whole plot was rather interesting and enjoyable. I bought the book 3 summers ago because when I was 11 I went to visit my elementary school best friend in Cali and we played charades and the book she chose was Wuthering Heights. She's this really scholarly genius and for the most part, I always trust her literature judgment. So anyhow, I'd planned to read the book that summer, only to realize that I'd be reading it senior year. So then i decided to put it off till then. After 3 years of having the novel in my possession, I'm finally reading it. I must say that there is an imp of regret not having read it earlier so instead of frantically attempting the impossible (reading 265 pages in one day), I could have just worked on 45 insane questions. But the impossible I shall try to achieve. I'm finally halfway through the novel....so that means with 24 hrs left to go I can finish the book and do all the questions. It's never too late to start getting ambitious.....

Whats does your personality rate from 1-10? by morning_prayer
Your first full name
Your personality rates a	11
your best quality is	your music taste rules
your worst quality is	youre too sweet
this is because	Of the people you hang around
Created with quill18's MemeGen 3.0!

I got this off of jhgpy's blog...it totally reminds me of something someone could have written for Spradley's satire pamphlet....It's absurdly funny....so brace yourself (well i know all the females out there will be laughing...and guys...never reject some good advice =P) I only posted a few...the ones I thought were the funniest.

Prom Tips (for guys)
7. What to wear?
You must look formal. Not semi-formal, but full formal. You need some sleek shirt, and nice formal pants. Black pants require black shoes. You can wear the jacket if you want. But if you accessorize with a cane and hat, you've gone too far. For males, dressing formally is quite simple. This is because we all lack any sort of fashion sense. The key is to look almost exactly like every other guy that you see at the prom. That way, your date may discard and replace you at any time she feels the urge. Nobody will be able to tell the difference. However, that does not excuse you from forgetting about hygiene. Brush your teeth, clean your ears, shave, and please, take a shower.
8. Dinner
Let her pick the dinner location if she requests it. If she does not request or suggest anything, it is assumed that you are selecting the site. First of all, do not go to any restaurant whose name includes the word "buffet". Prom dinner is not an eating contest. Think classy. Class above satisfaction. Do not go to a place that shows you your meat alive before you eat it. Unless it's aquatic. If you are selecting which cow to slaughter, you're in the wrong place. Also, anywhere that has drive-thru is a no-no. Your prom dinner must not be eaten while driving. Do not order anything that comes with fries or onion rings. Try to go somewhere that you can leave from without any food stains. Do not eat with your hands. This may only be done in extreme situations, or if she is in the bathroom. Taking home leftovers is not a mark of shame. Do not stuff yourself too much. She does not want to dance with a bloated pig. Unless she insists otherwise, you will pay for the dinner. Don't pay with all coins, and tip the waiter, unless he was hitting on your date.
9. The dance
Obviously, you are expected to dance at the dance. You can't just stand there doing nothing. She is not a stripper and you are not her pole. If you don't know how to dance, try anyways. Slow dancing is simple. The two of you basically sway together, usually creating a circle or oval on the dance floor. For the music of a faster pace, you're usually on your own. If you have no moves, follow these simple dancing procedures: start with feet about shoulder's width apart, continually bend and unbend knees slightly, have arms in a relaxed fighting stance, let body and arms bounce with the bending of the knees, move feet every few seconds, move arms and head with the music. If nothing else, she'll laugh and think you're cute.

pulse check......

Long time no update, for me at least....=P

well I guess I'll begin with Good Friday service/ 30hr famine.
Our awesome skit team spent hours preparing for the skit, and I heard many positive things about it. I'm definitely proud of how far the team has come, and it's a great experience worshiping God through drama and being able to serve him by using our gifts. It's also humbling to think that through this act of worship we are learning that our service is NOT TO US and all for Him. There was a lot of reflection on the character of Jesus and what it was that He did on the cross. I felt very at peace just being able to give glory to God through singing and praying. It was when I was most at peace that I began to feel extremely hungry due to the fact that I was well into around 23 hours of fasting (for 30 hour famine). During that time I began to reflect on my relationship with God, and as i shared with the people there, I realized my physical hunger paralleled my spiritual hunger. I realized that as a result of a lot of things in my life, my walk with God was suffering. I was longing, hungering for some spiritual feeding that I'd been neglecting myself of. God is supremely loving and although I fail him and set him aside at times, He does everything to draw me into His arms again. Just the realization of God's awesome love for a wretch like me truly leaves me standing amazed.
Thirty hour famine was great. We raised close to $7000 for hunger around the world!!! The bible study we had was a great reminder of God's commandment to us about caring for the widowed, orphaned, and the foreigner. I pray that God will continue to stir compassion in our hearts. Thanks to Gloria for taking the time to organize and prepare for such a meaningful event. =)

So today is Easter and there's so much joy in the resurrection of Christ. Our thankfulness will never be sufficient for the grace He's provided us.

Make the best of each day that you will never live again.

my life as a senior citizen....

wowee. *understatement* What a crazy week. My head is still a little mumble jumbled from all the work and lack of sleep, but I'm surprisingly awake. I thank God for keeping me up this week to finish all the things I needed to accomplish.

So I was looking through old ghetto 80s photo albums yesterday to find a baby picture for the senior slide show. I find this entire album with just pictures of my head....i cant believe how round it was back then. Back in elementary school, I use to love looking at old photos and laughing at myself. But now, it's harder to believe that I was actually that little at some point in life. I remember I use to think that I looked the same as when I was born, but now I look at pictures and I cant remember ever looking like that. My parents liked to take pictures of me eating ice cream and throwing up when I was a baby. Then when I was a bit older, they liked to take pictures of me making really weird faces...maybe they wanted to make a flip book..cuz you probably could.
I like looking at old pictures of friends and fond memories. But looking at my old baby pictures was a strange experience. Like thinking that i'll be off to college next year, flipping through old albums is quite surreal.

I will hasten and I will not delay to obey your commands.....

That's what my sister said when my parents came home today...hahah...

So I was looking over the pictures taken at Thai Gourmet. There's this picture of Phil, Mok, Peter, and Simon singing a whole new world from Aladdin. I never realized it before, but the store behind it (in big bold letters) says BIZZARRE BAZAAR. I found that slightly amusing. (although many of the pictures are quite the knee slapper.)

I was talking to my mom's friend about a bunch of stuff over dinner a few nights ago, and we got on the topic of piano. She didnt realize that I use to play the piano and when she asked how long I had played, I shocked myself. I hadn't really thought about how long I'd played until I actually stopped playing. Even now, I still go over to the piano and play some of the songs I use to love playing; and on occasion, I still play the songs that frustrate me....just to see if i can play them better now =P I remember when I was a wee little lass, I begged my parents to let me play the piano, and I loved playing until I was about 12 when I got a new teacher. I loved my teacher....but she always made me play the songs i'd played before. There's something exhilarating about playing the piano. For me, it's sorta like when I run. It's both stress relief and relaxing. It's a shame I dont play as much as I run.

Apparently, there's these ATM money snatching criminals that were metioned on the UT site (my mom's really concious of the goings on of UT these days). They place hidden cameras on the envelope slot and then store a completely different card inserting slot to get your PIN and your number. These people have gotten a butt load of money from this. So be careful when you're getting money from the ATM machine....check to see if there's a hidden camera behind the envelope slot.

the not so perfect world we live in....

Do you ever wonder why people find enjoyment at the expense of others? Like how people enjoy watching someone trip over things. I had a teacher who made videos of people tripping, just so he could laugh at them. Or how people like to see those who win all the time lose..or witness the most accepted people receive rejection. Is it because people gain some kind of satisfaction in watching the best of mankind fail? No one's perfect and no matter what we do to prevent it, nature will run its course..stuff happens.
People have been asking me all sorts of weird questions lately. Mostly about stuff I didn't know they knew about me. It's weird wondering how they hear about what goes on in my life, especially when I dont really know them. It's funny how connected everyone is these days. News travels pretty fast via aim or blogs. And going with my quote from yesterday, there's some curious bees out there reading random xanga and blogs and then you find out about some random person's life and what happens when you actually meet them?
I guess it reminds me of this person I've known for a long time, or well I've heard lots about them throughout the years, but I never actually met them. So in a sense, it seemed like I knew the person pretty well since I'd heard so much about them. Then when I finally met them, it was in reply to an email I'd sent to the person. It was funny cuz I'd heard from others that this person was a great person, but the way they turned out to be was not what I'd expected. They turned out to be unbelievably encouraging, intellegent, and funny. So although it seems like you know someone through reading their blog or hearing stories....you dont really get to know someone until you talk to them in person. and i lost my train of thought....

you only got one shot.....

So I came home and made a toasted pastrami, turkey, lettuce, tomato, dijon mustard, bagel. It was really good. Sat at the tv and was shocked when I flipped to the fob movie channel and saw both Louis Koo (the funny looking guy whom I adore over on the right) and Daniel Wu (another adorable fella) in the same movie. The movie was okay. It was the typical.... the bad guy killed my brother, OOOH i need to get revenge...type of movie... It reminded me of something Francis said after the track meet, "How can you frown when you see something so fine." haha.. it was funny when she said it, i guess you just had to be there.

A few days ago, I was reminded of this question I missed on the Heart of Darkness test. The question was about the meaning of this quote, "'I don't want to bother you much with what happened to me personally,' he began, showing in this remark the weakness of many tellers of tales who seem so often unaware of what their audiences would best like to hear." Basically the quote is saying that people like to hear about what goes on in other peoples' lives. There's always this level of curiousity or interest....and somehow people like to talk about their lives and share the little stories that go on. It's funny. Just one of my random ramblings.....

all rained out......
"Rainy Days" --- mary j. blige

I love rain. Everything is refreshing about it except for the humidity of the wretched houston weather. I like how little drops fall on my eyelashes and I can see water drops fluttering when I blink. I like how rain smells and how puddles form so that I can jump in them. I like laughing in the rain and how it makes me feel like I'm in the movies. Rain brings back both the best and worst of times. It was raining today....and my last meet forever got cancelled.

Techincally speaking, I still have 2 more meets....both district meets....but those aren't as fun because there's more pressure and they're really boring and strict. Plus they're at the new Hightower stadium this year, so most of us aren't riding on the bus cuz it's so close. It was so much fun on the bus today. The boys were all gossiping in the back; while the girls were playing telephone....my track girls rock. I'm actually really gonna miss spending 12 hours every friday with them. This has been the best track season ever. I've gotten to know the girls better over the years and we actually say hi to each other in the halls now, and we talk about significant things instead of the usual... oh i have a test to study for. It's interesting how this year turned out. I really pushed myself this year.....I guess I was trying to discover what my limit is....and you know, every drip of sweat and hard work put out this year was all worth it. Man, track has been such a big part of my life for so many years...it's hard to believe it's finally over. How bittersweet =)

I actually have a ton to blog about tonight....but not I dont really feel like finishing....but I had every intention of blogging about something.....maybe if i remember what it is...i'll enlighten you.

Whoa....

so five seconds after i finished blogging that last entry about having a nasty day...Youth With A Mission called my house (an organization I asked for follow-up from Urbana). The lady (I feel horrible for forgetting her name) just talked with me about whether or not I was interested in joining their discipleship training this summer. I told her that I'd prayed about it and that YWAM wasnt what God had in store for me this summer. She asked if I had any prayer requests and I told her that I was going to college next year and with that said, she told me she wanted to pray for me right then. Her prayer really related to a lot of what's going on with me now. She prayed for my friendships, being strong in school, and also being assured that I tried my best after I finish high school. There were a few other things. But it just really amazed me how awesome God is. He led someone to pray for me when I needed it...and I didn't even have to ask. God's always on the look out for you, so don't let the hard times discourage you. It's at the low points in life that we should Turn Our Eyes Upon Jesus...

What do I want.....

Haha...so I was listening to Brandy's You Dont Know...and Isabel walks in and starts dancing. I gotta say..she's this crazy little coreographer. Her and her little buds Megan and Emily spend hours each week making up dances to songs. Their project this past week was Jessica Simpson's With You. Oh and I was reading Christine's blog when she walked in and she saw her new "I love nerds" shirt...and she asked me, "Gah jie...are you a nerd?" And then...she proceeds to tell me that when Chad Michael Murray was in hs...he was a nerd and no girls liked him. As you can see Debs has been a great influence on my sister.

It's hard to love those who treat you with the greatest disrespect. It's hard to love those who throw scathing words at you. It's hard to love those who trample all over you on a bad day. It's hard to love those who hate you. But I love them because Jesus first loved me.

In the midst of a crummy day, God placed this song in my view:

I love you more than the sun
And the stars that I taught how to shine
You are mine, and you shine for me too
I love you yesterday and today
And tomorrow, I'll say it again and again
I love you more...

More--- Matthew West

It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need
someone to clean up after them. Anita, age 9

Blogging is like procrastination, you can get hooked. I promise to limit my long entries for the sake of those who read an infinite number of blogs a day. But thanks for stopping by to visit Joey. However, some days I just feel the need to type for long periods of time. Some things are just meant to be written out if not said.

April is a pretty crazy month. So much is happening around me that I feel a tad whelmed. But this is good....cuz it keeps me from being indifferent and numb to situations and relationships in my life while helping me pursue growth in my prayer life. I like being whelmed because it keeps my senses keen. I suppose that's one of the reasons why I love remember peoples' birthdays...and learning to say the alphabet backwards in 3 seconds. By whelmed I dont really mean overwhelmed-- having a lot of stuff going on or being bombarded with an overload of activities. For me it's being able to sustain a balance between being able to do the things i enjoy and doing the things I need to do but not necessarily prefer doing. It's actually a rather difficult task. It's not hard to make time to do the things i like to do, but it's all that school grunge work that's so tedious and thorny to cope with. It's that aspect of my whelmness that makes my balance so hard to attain. haha... okay this entry is getting long...and I'll stop before I lose myself and I lose you. This is by far one of the most meaningless entries I've ever written.

Did I ever mention that I got this email from this person who has a website and they wanted to link my blog under the "chinese herbal medicine" category? I found that rather amusing...chinese herbal is good stuff...does everything need a scientific explanation?

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus" Phil 4: 6-7

from here on out.......

brace yourselves for a long one

It's funny how when I was younger, I dealt with things a certain way; and as a result of the experiences in my life, I gained more wisdom in my decisions, and a different perspective about a lot of things. Some of the same issues I encounter now that I had to face when I was younger, seem so trivial and so not worth the time...knowing that it's not as important as I once perceived it to be. But back in the day, if things failed or just didn't go my way, it was the end of the world. Throughout the years I've come to understand that the sacrifices made are worth it cuz through it all you learn what things are truly important in life. So i guess growing older does have it's pluses.

For a while I knew I wanted to go to UT. I've always been passionate about going into social work, and when i visited the Longhorn saturday, I loved it. The students that gave the orientation were great. After that I liked UT, but I knew that if i didn't get in, I wouldn't be bummed at all cuz I know my Father has the perfect, most beautiful plan for my life, and I was excited to wait and see what that would be. After getting my acceptance to St. Edwards, it was awesome knowing that my future could be in social work and that I would be in Austin. I liked almost everything about St. Edwards. It was then that I realized my contentment for God's plan, and amazingly I got accepted into UT.

After my acceptance I had one fear, and that was to fall into the college trend. I've moved around a lot throughout my life, and I know what it feels like to start over-- to feel totally uncomfortable with your surroundings...and it's not a pretty feeling. But I've always thought that college would be somewhat like that. It may sound odd, but that's actually how i want college to be. I want it to be a place where I'm lifted out of my comfort zone and truly have to learn dependence and trust in God. I figured that if I went to UT i wouldn't be able to experience that completely. so.. for the past several months, I'd been praying about joining a servant team this summer in Mexico. I pretty much left it up to God, although I really wanted to go. After months of praying, I realized that Mexico this summer wasn't in God's will. I'd initially wanted to be a part of the work crew down there to able to serve God and discover more about him by taking a step out of my comfort zone. Well, my plans got shot down...but that's when God's plan came into play. I was seriously considering St.Ed's over UT believing it would be a good experience to explore something different...away from friends...despite the fact that I know perfectly well what that's like. And there were a lot of other reasons why I would have chosen St. Ed's over UT. But through prayer... the little reasons started becoming reasons why I should go to UT. It's funny how God works. Cuz today I was still having some doubts....but well friends are like messengers from God sometimes, and I'm glad God crossed one in my path today. She really reminded me that the college experience depends on how I make it. No matter where I go I wont have to worry about the whole comfort issue... when you go to school with tens of thousands of people...one way or another you'll face an uncomfortable situation....it's just an added bonus when you have friends to share the experience with. I still dont want to be just another typical machine pumped chinese church going person at UT making all sorts of commitments as a frosh, but I do want to lead a fulfilling college experience...and I know God will make that happen at UT...so that's where I'm headed this fall.

And you know what else is funny? Just when you think you're done praying.....that's when the praying really begins. =) It's like i've overcome my plans....letting go of all I've hoped for...but now it's God's turn to run things...and His path is beginning to look clear...but somewhat scary as well. But like I always say, I dont know what the future holds, but I'm sure glad I know who holds the future.

I wanna hold your hand.......

I love oldies. awesome song....is it by the beetles?

The past couple of days have been a blur. A lot of busy work this week. I know I wanted to blog about something yesterday, but I fell asleep around 9 and i missed that chance. So I'll talk about my track meet today.

Well, I had A lunch so i got to see ALL the girls at school!!!!! that's the first time besides Glo's orch concert that that's happened. Juice, G-shock, Coons, and Honer were ALL there!!! and the kewl part was coons and honer dont usually have A lunch...so today was extra bonus day. So it was pleasant missing physics, although I have to make up a lab now... and it's a shame i missed english cuz I really like that class and ms. spradley's awesome. It was amusing having her explain the assignment to me.
Anyhoo, got to bus around 12 and headed to Brenham, home of the bluebell ice cream. OOOOH and the stadium we ran at was right across the street from bluebell and a coke factory. Well, it took close to two hours to get there. We were 30 minutes away from A&M so...and ex-track hero from clements came to visit us. OHH and this dude from UT who went to Brenham HS came to watch the meet cuz he holds the high jump record there...the high jump record for Texas, the high jump record for nationals, and the high jump record for the junior olympics....and he's trying out for the olympics in a few weeks. And he was wearing this HUGE burnt orange wind breaker...and he was SUPER tall. I guess that's why he can almost jump an 8 foot pole.

I shant reminisce about my debut on the track today, cuz that's nothing to remember this all-star by. But I think this is the first meet I've actually bonded with the rest of the team. I've always known the hurdlers and we're tite cuz we know how it feels to suffer the joys and pains in our event. But then I actually got to know a couple of other people pretty well in the past two meets also. It's funny how we've actually known each other for the past three years but never really associated with one another till the second to last meet before districts. The meet was really fun...good times, bumming with two weirdos on the bus.....although this sleeping machine couldn't help falling asleep and waking at random moments.

Every track season, I get this feeling that I want it to end because it's time consuming, stressful, and tiring...but when it ends I wish it wasn't over year. This year, I feel a little different cuz I know it's the last time in my life that I'm gonna be doing something that I really love doing....so the thought of wanting this season to be over hasn't really crossed my mind....and I'm definitely gonna be pretty darn sad when my track career is over. Don't even give me the "you can run in college" business... I sorta blew my chance at that after freshman year....but it woulda been awesome to be good enough for college track. But I figure there's gonna be bigger and better things....and track will always have one of the fondest memories in my mind.

I cant wait until the olympics. Watching the olympics makes me feel alive for some reason. It's amazingly exhilarating watching people run fast, jump high, fly through the air, and do all sorts of tricks. I'm oober excited =)

bahh.. waking at the crack of dawn tomorrow.....sorta.

Omnipotent.....

I was driving home from C.O.P when I started singing this hymn:

God's way is the best way
God's way is the right way
I'll trust in Him always
He knoweth the best

Being in the presence of God and finding confidence that he heard my prayers tonight at concert of prayer left me standing in awe of Him. I love knowing that there's someone out there that has total control of what's going on and what's going to happen...and He's got the perfect plan for my life. This hymn reminds me of how sometimes when I pray, I expect things to happen just as I'd hoped they would...but "God's way is the best way" and he truly "knoweth the best" so at times life isn't the pretty picture you paint for yourself. Sometimes after God's answered my prayer, I'll reflect on just how he answered it; and if I'm lucky, I'll understand a part of the reason why things turned out God's way and not my own. Thank goodness God doesn't always answer prayers my way....His purposes are always so richly blessed. It's not always evident at first, but it's like a puzzle...bit by bit...it all starts to piece together. As overstated as it may be.... there is a reason for everything....

and now.. to be anticlimatic....I went to baskin robins today with one of the awesome track girls. She had my all time favorite Pralines and cream...and i ventured to try something new: Key Lime Pie.....talk about DElicioUS. IOno...everyone should try it...just like everyone should try pralines and cream and bubble gum at maggie moos. Oh and grapes are good....I came home today and witnessed the most amazing spectacle... grapes and apples in the same drainer...*drool....I love fruit.

Every time.....

So I decided to play a little catch up with my fob tv before I started off on my Gulliver's Travel binge. I flipped to the movie channel and I came across this really wacky korean movie. My face was twisted up after watching the last 4 minutes of the movie. So here's the plot so you can share in my twisted face experience:

So this guy meets his roomie's older sister in high school and he totally falls head over heals for her. This guy gets really sad when he sees the girl of his dreams going out with all these guys in college. So he had planned to express his feelings for her when he realized he couldn't muster up enough courage to do so. SO the alternate solution? Dress up like a woman so he could get close to her and become her best friend....and that's exactly what happened. Well, the girl finally finds herself a man whom she thinks she can settle with and now that her and the guy that really likes her are best friends, she tells him everything about her life (not knowing that he/she was truly her brother's roommate) Then she finds out that her bf was cheating on her and she runs home and pours out her heart to the cross dresser that really likes her. SO then the love sick puppy guy goes to find the girl's bf and confronts him about his appalling behavior...and he gets SO ticked that he pulls off his wig and reveals his true man identity just as the girl walks into the restaurant...thus discovering his little secret *gasp* so at this point everyone is a little disgusted. The girl's bf gets the socking of his life and faints....and the girl later confronts her secret admire about his little secret.....life goes on and they split for good. Time goes by and the girl finds the ex-cross dressers diary in her brother's college boxes in her house. She discovers all the sacrifices the guy had made for her and decides to dump her bf and hook up with the younger-than-her-cross-dressing-man-who-was-deeply-infatuated with her.

I was actually anticipating one of those typical Asian endings. You know....how the girl all of a sudden acquires cancer thus providing the opportunity for the guy to express his true feelings for her...and when he finally decides to tell her how much he loves her...she dies. So in a way I'm glad I didn't waste ten minutes of my life watching another Asian tragedy...

When it comes to reading books, I have one fear: The Fear of Falling Asleep. I love to read, but I love to sleep more...and it doesn't help that I'm one of the world’s second slowest readers. But you know, for once I have the determination to press on....

Deuteronomy 31:6
"Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you."

In my weakness He is my strength...and when I can't bear to stay awake any longer...He'll be there to wake me up. So now I'm off to an adventure of a lifetime.....reading a novel satirizing old fashioned travel books.

I'm alright...it only hurts when I'm breathing......

So what did this long long day of mine consist of?
I couldn't find two matching socks this morning, so one sock was longer than the other.
I discovered that I bought crunchy granola bars instead of chewy.
I ordered a small track shirt, they gave me a medium.
I found an entire package of strudel bites with mold all over them, which i had to throw away.
I discovered we have packages of chicken sandwich meat that looks like ham.
I finally passed a cal test.
I realized I stayed up until the wee hours to finish my govt packet for no reason, but now i'm ahead of the gang so woohoo.
It feels like my legs are splitting in half, shin splins = big mofo. (currently have huge ice packs on legs)
I came home after practice (thank goodness we didn't go to kempner today), and made myself a nice large cup of ICED CHAI tea latte =)

And now....I think it's time to start my hw since teachers are so kind to us these months right before the APs...and we're bombarded with oodles of reviews. But you know what? That's okay...in a few months these little high school joys will come to a permanent close. *tear*

oh and Peter so kindly reminded me that I have indeed accomplished more than one task on my to-do before graduation list: college acceptance letter. =)

I heard Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind is really good.

every person is a book waiting to be read....we all have a story to tell...

This is by far one of the best breaks I've had in a while. I didn't really have to worry about any homework stuff until about an hour ago =) but that's another story I'll save for later.

This time last year I went camping in Corpus Christi. That took me a while to remember. Gosh...i've made a lot of memories this past year. I was putting some pictures in my photo album this afternoon and I realized that a lot has changed, and in the days to come, a lot more will change. It's a pitty how changes aren't always good. There's so many times in my life where I wish I could freeze frame the picture. You know what they say about pictures...they only show the best part of memories...I guess that's what makes them so treasured...and maybe that's why I like em so much. Looking at old pictures always makes me smile really big...like how a baby smiles when they see this super awesome fluffy stuffed bunny. I like looking at old pictures and remembering the good and the bad times, and think about the things i've learned and how i've grown as a result of the pain, frustration, joy, and love.

I remember that list of things I want to do before I graduate. So far I've only accomplished one thing...cooking dinner for my family. Next weekend, isabel might come visit my potentially clean room. Hopefully, I'll get to go to a concert in the months to come, and maybe if I'm lucky, I'll stay awake long enough to witness the sunrise.

God's been good to me Oh God's always been good....

the agony of defeat.....

Today could have easily been the worst day of my life...but you know, God wouldn't let that happen. I could have fallen miserably and once again scrapped up my entire body. I could have gotten a heat stroke. I could have thrown up. I could have missed the bus. I could have been spiked in the head. But God didn't let that happen =)

Despite all that did not happen, I shall share with you what did happen. Today was by far the longest day of my entire life. Woke up at 6:20 this morning. Brushed my teeth and then I ate a nice hearty peanut butter and banana sandwich. =D Dug around my house for a working set of headsets for my cd player...didnt find one. Left my house at 6:55....and made it to school just as the bus was about to leave at 7:03. We arrived at Warton at who knows when, but I just woke up from a nice 45 minutes nap. It was really cloudy and the entire team was hoping and praying that perhaps the meet would rain out and no one would have to run. It didn't rain. In fact, the weather was SOO good that everyone got burned in some way or another. So i waited for about 4-5 hours before I had to run. By that time I was rather sleepy. Warmed up with the resta the hurdle girls (and surprise we were the majority at the meet today =D) Ran a stinky race, buuttt I made finals so that was awesome. So after I ran, I cheered on my teamates who did superb. OHHH and lunch was REALLY GOOD. I love attending events with great lunches...that's why Jess draged me to math olympiad in middle school =P So you're prolly wondering wut i ate. Well, I ate a HUGE sloppy joe sandwich, pickels, cheetos, starbursts, and a dr.pepper. Talk abt massive energy boost. Aftear waiting another 2 hrs. I ran again. and AHHHHHH I RAN THE FASTEST TIME I'VE EVER RUN IN HS! so that was the good part.....and the bad part is... I've never had such a painful race before. The two girls to the left and right lanes of me in the heat...were clearly amateurs. I've NEVER in my hurdling career been slapped so brutally. I remember my deathly fall freshman year was the result of such an attack. However, today I was a fighter....but these girls were beastly. Maaan....and you will never understand the agony of defeat until you miss the silver medal by .01 seconds...yes.... a HUNDRETH of a second. And so i came in fourth because both the girls slapped me at the last hurdle and I came tumbling in fourth. and my dreams of getting a medal melted away in less than a blink of an eye. I'll take me some time to forgive myself. However, after I ran through the first flight of hurdles to qualify for finals, I could SOOO feel the presence of God and i KNEW that someone had been praying for me. So I thank you. You know who you are...and I'm so blessed to have experienced the power of that prayer today. =)

Like I said...today was a long day. And I've been SO blessed in every way. I didnt have to run the 300 meter hurdles, which i absolutely loathe....and i was fortunate to walk away unscathed .....save for a burnt nose. And when I only expected to be running through 100 meter hurdles once today...God placed me in a position to run twice...and both times I was able to overcome that jinx of falling at the first meet of every season. God is good all the time....all the time God is good....

when in doubt...trust in God....and pray....the ultimate solution to every great obstacle in life.

boy is it good to be home 12 hrs from this morning.

I'll save you the pain of having to read another senseless heading. SO anyhow...wut a wonderful week this one has been. I remembered that I had something to blog about last night when i got home...but now i dont really remember.

Thai Gourmet last night was fun. The loft wasn't as lofty as I'd imagined. I actually imagined this lofty place above the restaurant overlooking the other customers.....I sorta imagined us eating at this table where we would have to kneel and eat uncomfortably. NOw that I think about it, I sorta thought of a Japanese restaurant. Anyhow, the food was good, but not worth the price...however the fellowship really made up for any complaints i might have had. I'll be getting my pictures back soon.... so maybe i'll attempted scanning pictures again. I realize that after using a digital for a while....a roll of film is nothing...24 pictures goes quick...like *snap*

So my first meet fears have returned...not quite as bad as the previous time. so PTL for that. But say a prayer for me if u have the time or if u remember....I dont wanna fall tomorrow, but that's not really a great fear anymore....i really dont know wut im afraid of. It's one of those "walls" in life that I just gotta overcome. Once again... trust God with everything...even the stupid things like being able to survive 18 hurdles. That's like...nothing for the guy who created the heavens and the earth right?

I think i've succumbed to writing with lots of periods again... after finishing all my college essays...i've ascending from that mentality. I'm back to my old self again...no longer striving to achieve high writing quality...i mean... cuz "it doesnt really matter anymore." Hum...i'm having some really random thoughts today.

Drama team was great. The whole team is very lovable. They're talented, easy-going, and fun to work with. I learn new things about them every time. Last time... il learned that if Niki kept her last name, got married, and had a child, and named it CHCH....then her kid would be called CH-CHNG...sorta like ch-ching. Oh...and today I learned that Johanan was born in Florida. Iono...for some reason I find that really interesting. I wonder wut our next encounters will hold.

Ahhh... i love spring break. In fact, I've enjoyed it SO much that my work has been utterly neglected. I feel both ashamed and overwhelmed. But you know...there's no better way to finish my high school career ....but to finish it off strong. My work load isnt too burdensome...i should be able to finish it all tomorrow at the track meet....heck.. i have ALL day to do hw.....it's a blessing in disguise...despite my fears

I guess this kind of entry is the result of lack of brain usage for the past howevermanydayswe'vebeenonbreak. Hope your break was super duperde duuuuper great.

reality check.....

It was fun volunteering to put together easter baskets this morning. Through miss Jan's sharing I was reminded that full time ministry emcompasses a wide array of things, even a doll ministry. It's always a curious thing when God calls you to something but a direction hasn't completely been revealed. But then, in the long run it becomes so clear what it is you're lead to do.

I like my CBS group. We are the epitome of a small group...in a literal sense of course. Our rather small number of members enabled us to ride in Margarete's convertible. It was amusing watching Mich's hair flap around in the wind. Anyhow, it was nice just talking with the girls tonight about whatnot. some things to think about.

To my surprise, I actually got myself out to a track today. This afternoon i went track hunting. Apparently, most schools lock up their competition tracks over the break, makes sense. So after about half an hour, I finally found a track. I went to run at the dulles track behind the school. Fortunately, I found some hurdles around the track. There were only 2 and they were both broken. So i looked around the grass for sticks or just any objects to stick into the hurdles so they could be the right size. I managed to find a piece of plastic and bubble gum wrapper, those worked the best. I wonder wut saturday's meet is gonna be like.

tomorrow is another day.

it's a beautiful day in the neighborhood....

I dont know where to begin. I'm lodged at that point where I'm tired and not tired but I dont exactly feel like sleeping either. So i guess i'll talk about my break thus far. exciting i tell ya. Renewed my passport yesterday, got a chance to unintentionally explore Richmond, that was exciting. I also got to try the Santa Fe Trio sandwich at Quiznos. Em... man.. now i really cant decide which i like better...Subway or Quiznos. They both have their pluses. Speaking of which I'm craving subway. I think i've been craving it since last summer.....the last time i had it.

Went to Galveston today. It was a lot cooler than I expected, but I like cool weather, so it was really nice. I think i flew a kite for about 2 hrs. It's actually pretty fun watching this colorful flying thing fluttering in the sky. And there's this odd thrill of letting the kite string roll between the grip of your hands and watching the kite fly. I remember when i was younger, I always go those cheapy paper kites that birds liked to peck at, so they never lasted too long. I always wanted those more plasticy material kites, like Annie's kite that i flew today. And my greatest apologies to JE for all those jabs to his spine i made with my knee. But it was worth the pain right? We eventually got a wonderful picture of a pyramid! Just look at Debstine blog. hehe...It was fun being at the beach, altho galveston beaches aren't the prettiest ones i've ever been to, I still think the ocean's awesome. I still can't believe I didnt manage to stay up all night to watch the sunrise at wintergetaway. I have yet to accomplish the task of watching a sunrise before i graduate.

It's frustrating sometimes knowing that your friend is doing something stupid but they're forcing themselves to learn the hard way because they wont believe you.

honesty like a rock.....

Today was a great day. I was little deaf in both my ears cuz of congestion....but nonetheless it was enjoyable. Lunch with friends and dinner with family, what a way to start a break. =) Then I got a call from one of the awesomest people on the face of this planet. It's always so refreshing to catch up with old friends. One of the best kinds of friendships are those that-- although you only see one another once a year, every time you're reunited, the bond is still pretty tight. The bond that holds you together is the connection you have through God. You dont have to see them or talk to them all the time, but you pray for each other whether you ask for it or not, and you listen to each other because of the love and care in the relationship. There's never any frustration, conflict, resentment, or arguments. Nor is there anything to keep from one another. Every thought, every feeling, every emotion, can be totally and completely revealed without any fear. And through all the struggles, hardships, and pain, there's always time in a day to say a prayer or two. This kind of friendship is hard to find, but blessed to have. I praise God for teaching me what it's like to have genunine friendships.

Springtastic

if you were wondering...the rodeo was fun. It's kinda relaxing bumming with your family after a long week. The highlights of the night had to be bumper car-ing with Haisun and going on this rollercoaster with Isabel. For starters, my sister (this insanely brave kid that wants to ride on the scariest rides ever) decides to drag her little friend (who is also 7) on this scary ride that spins around and around and around backwards in circles. Well, my sister's friend little bro, Haisun, decides to be brave and wants to go on this ride as well...so the three of them go on this ride. And as it turned out, Haisun was too short to ride by himself, so I had to go with him. I got to ride for free...which was kewl...but then halfway through the ride, he started to wimper...so i waved my arms around like a madwoman to make the guy stop the ride. After that ride, I realized i cant go on rides... not like i use to be able to. Rollercoasters are okay...but nothing that goes around in circles like crazy. Despite my new discovery....i was dragged on to several other rides. Oh and the BEST part was going on this rollercoaster which takes a pic of u during the free fall. So when isabel and i got off the ride we went to see our picture. On the right hand side you see me laughing and next to me is this picture Isabel totally freaked out....her mouth was all twisted and her eyes looked like they'd seen a ghost. We seriously cud not stop cracking up....hahaa....i love my sister she rocks.

The rodeo part of the rodeo was kewl....watching all the Bronc riding and cow wrestling...and barrel racing....yeah.. i never knew u cud do that much with cows and horses. And I never knew that bull riding was an olympic sport! yeah.. rodeo=kewl...altho i didnt get to eat a turkey leg...so the whole experience wasnt complete...nor did I get any funnel cake...but i still had fun. and did i mention....I had to sit through an hour of country music?

watched the Passion for Christ again today. The second time around was much more difficult to watch than the first. Watching it the first time was definitely very emotional. This time was very reflective and eye-cringing. Nevertheless, it was still a great movie. I wont ever be able to fully grasp the depth and love of Christ's passion....

I'm excited about spring break. It couldn't have come at a better timing. perfect timing no?

too lazy to think of an unrelated heading...i can almost hear the applause.

I needed a break from the studying I have just begun. This'll only take a few minutes...which i cant really spare...but i guess you could say im falling for the temptation to blog.
Well, as it turns out, I'm not running in the track meet tomorrow. I guess i feel a sense of relief, but saddness at the same time. Something always seems to come up the day of track meets. Anyhow, my mom got tickets to the rodeo, and i dont really get a chance to hang out with my family much, so I decided I would rather go to the rodeo than a track meet. So for everyone who prayed for me and encouraged me, thank you. I really appreciate it.

It's so bizzare how quickly good news travels. You can tell one person something in the morning...and 3 hrs later a dozen people know about the news. Wouldn't it be exciting if the Good News of Jesus was spread by word of mouth so quickly? Can you imagine HOW many seeds would be planted in a day? It's crazy...why isnt there an excitement to share Jesus the way we cant hold good news in?

well the good news today is...we only have one more obstacle before we will be confronted by the comforts of spring break.....tomorrow.....*pulls hair out* those of you guys will 3874628734 tests tomorrow...I'll definitely be praying for that alertness to stay up and the energy to remember all that you've studied.

For better or for worse.

"God can bring good out of everything, even when flawed and mistake-prone humans are involved. He is the real power behind the throne." -- Herb Vander Lugt

regardless of how life is..God is still good..all the time...and all the time...God is good.

there's always gonna be someone taller......

despite the fact that I'm really glad my english group gets to go tomorrow for our project...I really wish we woulda gotten to do it last week so I wouldnt have to miss korean bbq tonight. And to think....i really dont have hw cuz i actually finished the stuff due tomorrow yesterday. How diligent...eh?

It's pretty ridiculous how nervous I'm feeling about my track meet this friday. I think going this far into the season and not having run in a track meet yet has really killed my _______ i dont even know the word for it. But yeah, i feel like i'm gonna die. While 3 stepping hurdles once means I've improved, it also means that I'm more prone to falling and landing on my head and eating it bad, like every other year. It's not that past years have casted a shadow over my track career, it's just well, I cant exactly put my emotions into words. My stomach is a mumbo jumbo of feelings right now....and to think it's 5 days away. I cant really remember if I've felt like this in past years or not. Nervousness? Of course. Ridiculously nervous? maybe. There's very few things that I'm actually nervous about. And it's this aspect of track that I would perfer never to have to deal with again after this season. It's funny how the stupidest things can cause a person to feel this way.

And yes, you can even trust God with those things you consider stupid in life. Am I gonna pray about this nervous build up inside of me that feels like it's tearing out my insides? You bet I am. In fact, I'll be so bold as to ask you to pray for me. Running track and living life are relative. Having to overcome obstacles is a part of life as well as running a race. Heck... i run hurdles....i live to overcome hurdles. Just pray that I overcome the ones I'll face friday =) thanks

Dear God Boyz II Men

Dear god, it’s me again
I am so far from where I could have been
Dear god, I would be incomplete
But you came and touched my life in time of need
So I’m thanking you for all you’ve done
And for sacrificing your only Son

That’s why I’m writing you this letter
To let you know that I love you
Thank you for all that I am and for being a friend
Lord, my love for you will never end

Dear god, it’s Ophelia this time
I’m so grateful for the way you’ve changed my life
I’d give all I have, I’d just throw it all away
For a chance to walk with you through heaven’s gates
That’s why I’m thanking you for your love and your grace
I don’t deserve these blessings that you give me

Dear god, as a humble [woman] I come to you like a child
Needing your knowledge, your love, and your guidance, lord
Thank you for trusting me with my own life’s decisions
But I’m just a [woman], and I don’t deserve
This incredible life that you’ve given me
I love you lord, I love you

Dear god, it’s me Ophelia
I’m so sorry, so sorry for living for me
But I promise from this day on I’m livin’ for you
’cause without you my life means nothing

PRAISE THE LORD

God answers prayers. Ann is now a part of God's kingdom =) Keep her in your prayers as she starts this new journey and life with Christ.

jda: haha hellooo
jda: sorry i was busy randomly iming ppl
jda: abt our new famuly menmebr/!!?
jda: no ?

if you give a mouse a cookie.....

What's so delightful about those caramel delights/Samoas? It's odd how they seem to be the most widely adored cookie of them all. Didn't the peanutbutter patties use to be up there on the most wanted list? There's some unspoken policy in my household that only one package of girl scout cookies are opened at a time. First it was these really tasty lemon things....then we had the pinatas and then..the samoas. So i was anxiously waiting for everyone to finishing eating the samoas so we could open our final pack of cookies. yes.....the long awaited THIN MINTS!

I miss those childhood years when my dad use to buy 5 packs of thin mints from every girl scout on the street. We'd have a stash of 20 boxes of thin mints in the freezer that'd last us around a year. Ah yes...the good ole days.

So you might be wondering....but wait! Ophelia hates chocolate! She's allergic to it! She'll break out in hives! Will it kill her?!!? Well, oddly enough....thin mints have never had a bad effect on me. I actually dont really like cookies either, but I like thin mints. So that makes thin mints a combination of two things I dont really like, yet when you put them together it creates a delightful sensation in my mouth.

I was going a little cuckoo reading One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest and writing poetry about the characters....when I discovered my family had broken the golden rule....2 open boxes of girl scout cookies! So I decided thin mints deserves a post all its own. Heck it sure made my day....now it's back to reading and writing...woopdee.

when all is said and all has come undone.....

you know how the little things in life can make you really happy sometimes? Like listening to a funny song, talking to an old friend, or bumming around with people that never cease to put a smile on ur face. In a nutshell, this week has kinda been like that for me. I admit that on the academic side, this week has been an uproar, but mentally and spiritually, it's been pretty refreshing....and at times even ironically relaxing.

Yesterday was by far one of the most amazing days of this semester. For starters the day was kinda surreal and left me questioning if some of the things that happened really happened. At track practice I managed to meet one of my life goals. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I have FINALLY (after 6 years) managed to three step more than once over hurdles. Like i've mentioned before, three stepping is the goal of any hurdler across the world. I was literally screaming and jumping up and down after i unconciously three stepped over the hurdle.....I'm still shocked. I actually havent run in a meet this season yet. I've had to miss the past 2 because of csm stuff, and there wasn't a meet this week....but next friday will bring on the pain. So i guess my love for the sport has been rejuvenated. =) or well... hurdling anyhow.

CBS was great tonight. Interesting as usual ...i love my girls...and Margarete is da bomb. She rocks...just ask Debs or Mich. To say the least, it was both relaxing and edifying being there and seeing some faces that I miss only too often. Yay for friends =)

May this week be a blessing to you. I remember at Star of Hope this guy was praying and he said something i never really think about. he said "Dear Lord, I thank you for this day that I will never live again." It's true...each day you live and the life you live, will only be lived once. John 10:10 Jesus came so that we could live the days that we only have one chance to live to the fullest.